My Acres of Diamonds, they are all around me.. they cover a pretty big regional footprint ... Singapore, Malaysia, Hongkong, Thailand, Indonesia ... Now, what (or who) do you think "diamonds" look like? ;)
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
My Acres of Diamonds
My Acres of Diamonds, they are all around me.. they cover a pretty big regional footprint ... Singapore, Malaysia, Hongkong, Thailand, Indonesia ... Now, what (or who) do you think "diamonds" look like? ;)
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Diamonds!!!! Don't miss those right under your feet!
In the course of building my Network and coaching new people in setting up their own global distribution franchise, specialising in products that address everybody's everyday health concerns, I often come across new distributors who get very excited about the potential of opening up exciting new markets. Like Thailand? Indonesia? India? China? Europe?
Whenever I have the chance, I'd advise these new apprentices against flying here, flying there and flying everywhere. Usually, the price of doing all that is disappoinment - massive costly disappointment. We're all familiar with the saying, "Rolling stones gather no moss". It is true. I've been there, done that. It's confirmed, as if I needed to :)
Besides, how can we build in other people's country if we don't first build well in our own? Furthermore, it takes a Turk, not a German, to build the Turkey market. I am quoting Gursel Ayikbaba, a handsome, battle-hardened Turkish leader sponsored into the business in Germany by the Diamond from Nurenberg, Gerhard Reuhausser, both of whom I had the privilege of meeting in Bangkok recently.
The story that captures and conveys, tells and retells, this advice best is the story about The Acres of Diamonds. Here, I quote a recent re-telling of the story in an email from Bob Proctor's Insight of the Day based on excerpts from a radio show, Our Changing World,
by Earl Nightingale, 1921-1989, author of The Strangest Secret.
"Acres of Diamonds
One of the most interesting Americans who lived in the 19th century was a man by the name of Russell Herman Conwell. He was born in 1843 and lived until 1925. He was a lawyer for about 15 years until he became a clergyman.
One day, a young man went to him and told him he wanted a college education but couldn't swing it financially. Dr Conwell decided, at that moment, what his aim in life was, besides being a man of the cloth - that is. He decided to build a university for unfortunate, but deserving, students. He did have a challenge however. He would need a few million dollars to build the university. For Dr Conwell, and anyone with real purpose in life, nothing could stand in the way of his goal.
Several years before this incident, Dr Conwell was tremendously intrigued by a true story - with its ageless moral. The story was about a farmer who lived in Africa and through a visitor became tremendusly excited about looking for diamonds. Diamonds were already discovered in abundance on the African continent and the farmer got so excited about the idea of millions of dollars worth of diamonds that he sold his farm to head out to the diamond line. He wandered all over the continent, as the years slipped by, constantly searching for diamonds, wealth he never found. Eventualy, he went completely broke and threw himself into a river and drowned.
Meanwhile, the new owner of his farm picked up an unusual looking rock about the size of a country egg and put it on his mantle as a sort of curiosity. A visitor stopped by and in viewing the rock practically went into terminal convulsions. He told the new owner of the farm that the funny looking rock on his mantle was about the biggest diamond that had ever been found. The new owner of the farm said, "Heck, the whole farm is covered with them" - and sure enough it was.
The farm turned out to be Kimberley Diamond Mine .. the richest the world has ever know. The original farmer was literally standing on "Acres of Diamonds" until he sold his farm.
Dr Conwell learned from the story of the farmer and continued to teach its moral. Each of us is right in the middle of our own "Acres of Diamonds", if only we would realize it and develop the ground we are standing on before charging off in search of greener pastures. Dr Conwell told this story many times and attracted enormous audiences. He told the story long enough to have raised the money to start the college for underprivileged deserving students. In fact, he raised 6 million dollars and the university he founded, Temple University in Philadelphia, has at least ten degree-granting colleges and six other schools.
When Dr Russel H Conwell talked about each of us being right on our own "Acres of Diamonds", he meant it. This story does not get old .. it will be true forever.
Opportunity does not just come along - it is there all the time - we just have to see it."
Whenever I have the chance, I'd advise these new apprentices against flying here, flying there and flying everywhere. Usually, the price of doing all that is disappoinment - massive costly disappointment. We're all familiar with the saying, "Rolling stones gather no moss". It is true. I've been there, done that. It's confirmed, as if I needed to :)
Besides, how can we build in other people's country if we don't first build well in our own? Furthermore, it takes a Turk, not a German, to build the Turkey market. I am quoting Gursel Ayikbaba, a handsome, battle-hardened Turkish leader sponsored into the business in Germany by the Diamond from Nurenberg, Gerhard Reuhausser, both of whom I had the privilege of meeting in Bangkok recently.
The story that captures and conveys, tells and retells, this advice best is the story about The Acres of Diamonds. Here, I quote a recent re-telling of the story in an email from Bob Proctor's Insight of the Day based on excerpts from a radio show, Our Changing World,
by Earl Nightingale, 1921-1989, author of The Strangest Secret.
"Acres of Diamonds
One of the most interesting Americans who lived in the 19th century was a man by the name of Russell Herman Conwell. He was born in 1843 and lived until 1925. He was a lawyer for about 15 years until he became a clergyman.
One day, a young man went to him and told him he wanted a college education but couldn't swing it financially. Dr Conwell decided, at that moment, what his aim in life was, besides being a man of the cloth - that is. He decided to build a university for unfortunate, but deserving, students. He did have a challenge however. He would need a few million dollars to build the university. For Dr Conwell, and anyone with real purpose in life, nothing could stand in the way of his goal.
Several years before this incident, Dr Conwell was tremendously intrigued by a true story - with its ageless moral. The story was about a farmer who lived in Africa and through a visitor became tremendusly excited about looking for diamonds. Diamonds were already discovered in abundance on the African continent and the farmer got so excited about the idea of millions of dollars worth of diamonds that he sold his farm to head out to the diamond line. He wandered all over the continent, as the years slipped by, constantly searching for diamonds, wealth he never found. Eventualy, he went completely broke and threw himself into a river and drowned.
Meanwhile, the new owner of his farm picked up an unusual looking rock about the size of a country egg and put it on his mantle as a sort of curiosity. A visitor stopped by and in viewing the rock practically went into terminal convulsions. He told the new owner of the farm that the funny looking rock on his mantle was about the biggest diamond that had ever been found. The new owner of the farm said, "Heck, the whole farm is covered with them" - and sure enough it was.
The farm turned out to be Kimberley Diamond Mine .. the richest the world has ever know. The original farmer was literally standing on "Acres of Diamonds" until he sold his farm.
Dr Conwell learned from the story of the farmer and continued to teach its moral. Each of us is right in the middle of our own "Acres of Diamonds", if only we would realize it and develop the ground we are standing on before charging off in search of greener pastures. Dr Conwell told this story many times and attracted enormous audiences. He told the story long enough to have raised the money to start the college for underprivileged deserving students. In fact, he raised 6 million dollars and the university he founded, Temple University in Philadelphia, has at least ten degree-granting colleges and six other schools.
When Dr Russel H Conwell talked about each of us being right on our own "Acres of Diamonds", he meant it. This story does not get old .. it will be true forever.
Opportunity does not just come along - it is there all the time - we just have to see it."
Thursday, June 17, 2010
The Greatest of All Life Skills
If you were asked to identify the Greatest of All Life Skills, the one thing that will help get you whatever you want in life, and give you happiness in your interactions with family, friends and other people, what would you pick?
Imagination? Visualization? Learning? Teaching & Coaching? Parenting? Making Things? Selling? Communication? Public Speaking? Having Empathy (EQ) for people? Caring & Sharing?
What's your pick? Is it something else? If so, what is it?
I pick Listening, which is to be distinguished from Communication. Aren't they the same thing, some may ask. No, because communication involves not just listening but speaking too. Listening is only a part of communication, though a very important part, without which there can be no meaningful communication. Without listening, I'd suggest, we also cannot do well many of the other things listed above e.g. parenting, caring & sharing, teaching & coaching, selling.
I sat in a workshop recently where some very wise and successful people shared this simple idea that all communication must have 3 components: the transmitter, the message and the receiver.
We need the transmitter to send out the message and the receiver to get it. There's never a lack of messages to send or receive in our information-rich world. Of the other two components, guess which one is under-developed or under-used: Transmitter? Or receiver? (Answer: Receiver!)
When thinking of the receiver, let's think of how the dial of a receiver is often not turned on full, or perhaps sometimes, not turned on at all, whereas the transmitter is often at work all the time, seemingly over-time. I often think about why we are created with one mouth and two ears but too often act like we were created otherwise? ;)
When I pick Listening, I don't mean listening as we habitually and carelessly practise it, but really listening i.e. listening with our heart, listening without jumping to conclusions, listening without passing judgment, listening without subjecting the message to personal processing and interpretation. Look at listening with heart this way: We let the message we receive enter our ears, go through our brains, and then sink into our heart and let it stay there. You can call that, taking the message to heart.
But how do we normally listen? The message enters one ear and we let it slip out of the other. Or we let the message enter one ear, subject it to a screening or interpretive process, and then register a message quite different from the original message!
If we could listen better, we would understand each other better. If we could understand better, we can relate to people better and connect more effectively.
In any session on life skills, how much of the time do you think we should train and workshop on the art of listening and how much time on public speaking? (I'd love to know what you think.)
By my reckoning, and you may or may not agree, the Art of Public Speaking is passe and over-rated. In contrast, the Art & Science of Listening is little appreciated, often neglected, yet holds the more important key to effective relationships at work and at home and happier, more productive communications and conversations in forums big and small, from the coffee shops to the United Nations.
If we would just learn to listen better, I believe, we can conceivably eliminate petty fights, socially costly misunderstandings, and big, destructive wars. If we'd just listen well, we'll inevitably learn to appreciate each other better, realize how similar people are, regardless of ethnic, religious, intellectual or socio-economic backgrounds, and then learn to accept and even love each other. What do you think?
One of Stephen Covey's 7 Habits of Highly Effective People exhorts us to "Seek first to understand, then only to be understood". How are we to understand, and then be understood, if we do not first listen well?
Motivational guru Zig Ziglar says help people get whatever they want and you will get whatever you want. But how would we know what people want, let alone help them get it, if we do not first listen and find out?
Can someone think of another life skill more powerful than Listening? This is not a rhetorical question that seeks to hammer home a point, caring not for an answer. It is a listening question that seeks out a considered response. Why? Because, I think, that whatever stands above or close to Listening as the Ultimate Living Skill, we better get really good at that one too.
Happy Listening - everyday, everywhere!
Imagination? Visualization? Learning? Teaching & Coaching? Parenting? Making Things? Selling? Communication? Public Speaking? Having Empathy (EQ) for people? Caring & Sharing?
What's your pick? Is it something else? If so, what is it?
I pick Listening, which is to be distinguished from Communication. Aren't they the same thing, some may ask. No, because communication involves not just listening but speaking too. Listening is only a part of communication, though a very important part, without which there can be no meaningful communication. Without listening, I'd suggest, we also cannot do well many of the other things listed above e.g. parenting, caring & sharing, teaching & coaching, selling.
I sat in a workshop recently where some very wise and successful people shared this simple idea that all communication must have 3 components: the transmitter, the message and the receiver.
We need the transmitter to send out the message and the receiver to get it. There's never a lack of messages to send or receive in our information-rich world. Of the other two components, guess which one is under-developed or under-used: Transmitter? Or receiver? (Answer: Receiver!)
When thinking of the receiver, let's think of how the dial of a receiver is often not turned on full, or perhaps sometimes, not turned on at all, whereas the transmitter is often at work all the time, seemingly over-time. I often think about why we are created with one mouth and two ears but too often act like we were created otherwise? ;)
When I pick Listening, I don't mean listening as we habitually and carelessly practise it, but really listening i.e. listening with our heart, listening without jumping to conclusions, listening without passing judgment, listening without subjecting the message to personal processing and interpretation. Look at listening with heart this way: We let the message we receive enter our ears, go through our brains, and then sink into our heart and let it stay there. You can call that, taking the message to heart.
But how do we normally listen? The message enters one ear and we let it slip out of the other. Or we let the message enter one ear, subject it to a screening or interpretive process, and then register a message quite different from the original message!
If we could listen better, we would understand each other better. If we could understand better, we can relate to people better and connect more effectively.
In any session on life skills, how much of the time do you think we should train and workshop on the art of listening and how much time on public speaking? (I'd love to know what you think.)
By my reckoning, and you may or may not agree, the Art of Public Speaking is passe and over-rated. In contrast, the Art & Science of Listening is little appreciated, often neglected, yet holds the more important key to effective relationships at work and at home and happier, more productive communications and conversations in forums big and small, from the coffee shops to the United Nations.
If we would just learn to listen better, I believe, we can conceivably eliminate petty fights, socially costly misunderstandings, and big, destructive wars. If we'd just listen well, we'll inevitably learn to appreciate each other better, realize how similar people are, regardless of ethnic, religious, intellectual or socio-economic backgrounds, and then learn to accept and even love each other. What do you think?
One of Stephen Covey's 7 Habits of Highly Effective People exhorts us to "Seek first to understand, then only to be understood". How are we to understand, and then be understood, if we do not first listen well?
Motivational guru Zig Ziglar says help people get whatever they want and you will get whatever you want. But how would we know what people want, let alone help them get it, if we do not first listen and find out?
Can someone think of another life skill more powerful than Listening? This is not a rhetorical question that seeks to hammer home a point, caring not for an answer. It is a listening question that seeks out a considered response. Why? Because, I think, that whatever stands above or close to Listening as the Ultimate Living Skill, we better get really good at that one too.
Happy Listening - everyday, everywhere!
Monday, May 17, 2010
Dubai Inspiration: Imagination + Resources can break all barriers
Unicity, Thank You! Thanks for the best holiday I’ve ever had. I love holidays and have enjoyed many so far in my life. However, I’ve never had a 7-star holiday, in a posh resort hotel (Atlantis Paradise), in a dream city (which aptly describes Dubai, a majestic city created out sand and sea) - all fully paid for.
What a generous bonus for our business-building efforts. What a great fore-taste of the concern-free Happy Life we are working for and racing towards. What an apt and meaningful choice for big dreamers like us.
Dubai was born out of the fertile imagination of a few rich sheikhs. From the tallest buildings to the grandest shopping malls, Dubai challenges all notions of size, scale, as well as what’s thinkable and what’s doable.
Where there was only desert, they created snow. Where there was only vast expanse of sea, they created islands – on one of which the Atlantis stands. Wherever there was lack (e.g. the lack of a domestic population), they created abundance (allow the entry of large numbers of foreign workers who outnumber the locals 4:1).
Dubai proved that with imagination and resources, nothing can hold us back, and anything is possible.
Now, isn’t that what the Unicity “Make Life Better” Opportunity is all about? Awesome!
{I was in Dubai for a 5D4N incentive trip with over 600 other members of the Unipower team in Thailand, Singapore and Malaysia in March 2010. The next free trip is to the Club Med in Maldives. In our business, we work from holiday to holiday - every 3-4 months ;) Wouldn't you like to come along?}
Sunday, April 18, 2010
3 Things That Make A Leader Great
On April 4th 2010, I had the privilege of sitting in a hotel ballroom with thousands of others to listen to and learn from some of the greatest leaders in the Unipower Team. Here, I'd like to share what I picked up from one of them - Khun Phawadon Nasareerat, a Presidential Double Diamond and the youngest ever Unicity Diamond at 33. What was extra remarkable about his achievement was that this former public health ministry officer who was part-timing as an aerobics instructor achieved it in 3 years.
The photo shows some of us who went to Bangkok for the UPS weekend with Khun Phawadon and his new, free company-sponsored Porsche - his reward for building up a Double Diamond rank organization!
We were on our way out to get a cab after the all-day UPS Advanced Leadership Training at Rama Garden Resort on April 4th when we heard someone call out my name from the dark. It was Khun Phawadon, all dressed in black, standing in the dark under a tree (which explains why we didn't spot him before he spotted us) - next to his brand new black Porsche.
It was so nice of him to call out to us, and then, to patiently take many photos with us, individually and as a group.
Earlier in the day, Khun Phawadon spoke on the three qualities of "a legendary leader", in the league of CEO Stewart Hughes and Triple Diamond Khun Rasa. If you want to be a geat leader, have a heart for others, he said. "Having a position or the rank won't get you there; having a heart for others would."
The three things that make a legendary leader, according to Khun Phawadon, and which we created the opportunity to revisit, review, contemplate and internalize in Singapore yesterday, are:
1) Give - Be a Giver: Have the spirit, the heart and the mindset of a Giver, giving and contributing unconditionally without expecting something in return. Having the heart of a Giver helps when we go out prospecting, sharing with people the Happy Life Project, and also, when we work as a Team to make a success out of every event created to support the success of our people. A Giver doesn't stop nor get discouraged when people say "No" to our opportunity, or seem to fail to notice our contributions. A Giver contributes freely anyway, without calculating or holding back for a direct benefit.
2) Stand - Be a standpoint for your people. Stand up for your people. Stand up for what is right and what is good for them. Our people may not always agree with what we advise or advocate, but we, as the standard setter, must keep doing, sharing and promoting what is right to do, not just what we or they like to do. Set the standard that our people will look up to and that would lift them up in their lives and in their business. Let's be there for others - be other-centred; not self-centred.
3) Change - Be prepared, be willing and be ready to change. Start by changing our dressing, our attitude, our mindset, our being. Change the way we talk and the way we lead. Do not resist change. Go for all the functions or events recommended for people and leaders to achieve personal breakthroughs and transformation. Dare to change, whether or not you like it, for the sake of others. Again, let's do what is right, not just what we like.
So, let's Give, let's Stand and let's Change! A huge thanks to K. Phawadon for sharing his wisdom - a wisdom well beyond his youth, and which must have come from working the ground, building his now-gushing pipeline.
Tuesday, April 06, 2010
The Happy People
Having fun, feeling happy and at home in Khun Joe's home in the Masterpiece Village, Bangkok
She, the Cause of the Happiness of Hundreds
Just back from another Unipower Seminar in Bangkok on 3rd April, I cannot help but marvel at how our amazing business can truly Make Life Better for people from all walks of life, so thoroughly, so completely.
At the latest UPS weekend, on April 3rd-4th, 10,000 people were inspired by the brand new success stories of four guest speakers - a high-profile business owner Khun Kiin, a little-educated seashell vendor Khun Tik, a young career police officer Khun Neh, and a playful, "good for nothing" dish-washing son of a hawker who is now a young Presidential Director, Khun Nikhom Jaima.
Here, let me introduce you to just one of them - Khun Tik (see photo), the little-educated woman who sold seashells (clams, cockles, mussels and the like, I presume) in the market.
Khun Tik, who is in her 40s, is a mother of 2 with little education, a 4th Grader. Her education was disrupted when her school closed down when she was only in the 4th grade. She started working at the age of 12, selling things in the market. That's the only way she knew how to make money.
From young, she recognized the importance of money. "Money is needed to make life better". How to make more money? Work harder. So, for 20 years, she would work very hard, setting up stall in the morning market and then, in the afternoon, setting up stall in the afternoon market so as to make more money. She'd do this every day for 10 years, then 20 years.
"I am my own boss. I got money but I am not rich," she said. "I also had no time for my children." During the festivals, the kids would ask for her time. But those would be the best time to do more business. She felt bad, but she couldn't help but continue to make the same trade-off - time (from the kids) for money (to feed the children, and also her mother, who became her responsibility after her father died). Over time, her health suffered.
When introduced to the Unicity Happy Life Project, Khun Tik realized that it offered just what she needed - money, time and health.
"I cannot read, I cannot write, but I know what's in the Unipower system - the KPI, the passport to success. Whatever I didn't understand, I'd just ask my upline. I only needed to follow."
"I remember one situation when I felt fear. I was doubtful. So, I called my upline who was elsewhere. He encouraged me, telling me that I am good enough, that I can do what I had to do, and that it's OK, I should just go do it." As a result of following that advice, Khun Tik got to recruit and build a Cambodian team. They were in the hall on April 3rd, waving the Cambodian flag in grattitude and admiration for her, their leader.
Khun Tik made a hard decision early on in in her Unicity business. "I learnt that I cannot ride on two horses at one time. So I made the decision early in my business to close my stall. I became a Director in 4 months."
Now, she is a Senior Director. "What does that mean? I don't know. All I know is that I make THB100,000 a month! Also, now, I have time to see my kids. I have better health." (THB100,00 works out to over S$4,000 - a big sum of money in Thailand).
Khun Tik remembers well and takes to heart the advice that she received from everyone of her big leaders. She remembered being touched by the the kind first words of Presidential Triple Diamond Khun Rasa to her: "Do you know that you can be the cause of success and happiness for hundreds of people?"
She remembered being encouraged by another advice: "We don't need smart people. We just need people with strong hearts."
In closing, Khun Tik wisely said, life is about choices, and encouraged everyone to make the right choice. Choice #1, Do the work first then play. Choice #2, Play first then do the work. Choice #3, Play Play and Play and don't work. "I chose the first one," she said.
One of the most powerful thoughts that Khun Tik shared was the significance of a butterfly. "The butterfly in flapping its little wings sends out waves across the universe." We can make a big difference in the life of others.
Now, if Khun Tik can do it, why not you? Be inspired, to do something about your life, and the lives of those dear to you.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Fisher Boy: From abject poverty to a life of luxuries in 6 months
Please meet Khun Num, a 21-year-old, whose personal success story kills all the excuses that people can possibly make for not making a success of their lives. You know, one of the choices in life, to make money or make excuses? Khun Num's story helps us make the right choice.
Khun Num hails from the southern Thai province of Surat Thani. His father, the breadwinner of his family, died when he was still very young, of pre-school age. To help his family out, and to see himself through school, he had to start working from the young age of 10. Khun Num would work by night, going out to sea with the fishermen, and in the day, he would go to school like all the other kids.
However, he'd have to walk miles to school for that was the only "transport" he could afford. On the way, he would look longingly, and often hungrily, at the food plied along the way, but he would have to settle for the only staple his family could afford - instant noodles, which he got to eat only when he reached home.
To people who heard his story, he came to be known as Noodle Boy and to me, the Fisher Boy.
When he reached high school age, Khun Num wanted to secure for himself a brighter future. He wanted to enroll himself into a technical school. But the school fees were too high. That didn't stop him from opening his mouth or what some people would say, "trying his luck". Well, he got lucky! He approached the school, declared his interest but pleaded that he had only a little money to afford a portion of the fees. The school, moved by his plea, and probably his quiet but steely determination (which remains evident today), agreed to take him in, letting him pay only what he could afford!
Some 6 months ago, in mid-2009, someone from the Unipower team in Unicity Thailand approached him, asking, "Do you want to be rich?". Sure, he does. But how? He was advised, he'd not be given the fish, that means no financial help. But he'd be taught how to catch the fish, by the best teachers. Khun Num was game, and willing to learn.
Given his meagre resources, he had to struggle every step of the way, but the difficulties never stop him. Money was needed at every step of the way - opening an account with Unicity with 500 baht, buying his first two products to try - Nature's Tea and Super Chlorophyll, collecting enough orders (equivalent to over S$1,000) to upgrade his account to a Fast Start account earning higher commission of up to 20-30%, purchasing the Business Owner's Pack, enrolling for the 3-day Eagle Camp, visiting Bangkok to behold his new future in the UPS.
He epitomises the Friedrich Nietzche wisdom, "He who has a why to live for can bear almost 'any how'".
Just half a year later, on 16 January 2010, Khun Num was to stand on the UPS (Unipower Seminar) Stage, in front of more than 10,000 people. That's when I first heard his amazing story. He shared his success and how he had achieved a high income of 50,000 baht (over S$2,000) a month. He was a picture of confidence and grattitude to the many great teachers who showed him the way, and the Unipower system.
On March 20th 2010, I met Khun Num in person, face to face, in Dubai, during our all expenses paid Unicity reward holiday. I learnt from his upline and leader, Presidential Ruby Khun Nagorn (first right in the photo), that the stay at the Atlantis Paradise Hotel was another of Khun Num's personal vision realized.
As he was building up his vision of the future, he came across a video of the Atlantis Paradise of Dubai. He then said to himself, he'd certainly like to go there for a holiday one day. That dream, which predated Unicity's Dubai trip announcement, has so very quickly become reality for Khun Num.
Other dreams will be realized as this very pleasant fellow, who walks ramrod straight with quiet confidence and a ready smile, continues to walk steadily and consistently towards his new life.
Everytime I think or talk about Khun Num, I can't help feeling that that his personal triumph over adversities - his quick rise from poverty to a life of riches and exciting new possibilities, with the help of Unicity the company and Unipower the people-enabling business-building system - simply empowers others to succeed. His story takes away all the excuses from our doing whatever we have to, to get the life that we want.
Be Inspired. Be Blessed!
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
You Can Do It: Be the Success that You Dream of
We don't have to be clever and figure everything out by ourselves. The greatest wisdoms have been retold and retold for generations. Pick and choose something that makes you better, happier.
Pick a favourite or two or more from the following "Bob Proctor's Insights of the Day" which I have selected from my collection for you to consider and internalize (i.e. to make a part of you)...
"If I accept you as you are, I will make you worse; however, if I treat you as though you are what you are capable of becoming, I help you become that." - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, 1749-1832, Author and Philosopher
"Perhaps the most valuable result of all education is the ability to make yourself do the thing you have to do, when it ought to be done, whether you like it or not; it is the first lesson that ought to be learned; and however early a man's training begins, it is probably the last lesson that he learns thoroughly." - Thomas H. Huxley
1825-1895, Biologist
"There comes a moment when you have to stop revving up the car and shove it into gear." - David Mahoney, Executive and Philanthropist
"Don't waste your life in doubts and fears: spend yourself on the work before you, well assured that the right performance of this hour's duties will be the best preparation for the hours or ages that follow it." - Ralph Waldo Emerson, 1803-1882, Poet and Essayist
"Those with goals tend to succeed because they are focused and know where they are going, while those without goals do not." - Ted Karam, Author
"You don't get to choose how you're going to die. Or when. You can only decide how you're going to live. Now." - Joan Baez, Singer, Songwriter and Activist
"The big secret in life is that there is no secret. Whatever your goal, you can get there if you are willing to work. It is called massive action. Action is the gas in the tank. Without it, the car will not run." - Marcy Blochowiak, Author of No Glass Ceiling
So, choose. Choose whoever, whatever you have always wanted to be and to do. Then, just Be, just Do.
You Can Do It!
Monday, January 18, 2010
Life After Politics: An Even Higher Calling
Please meet Khun Witthaya, an independent politician who served as a Senator for 7 years in Thailand's Upper House, representing a constituency near the Thai town of Khon Kaen.
He is now a Senior Director in Unicity, with big dreams of becoming a Presidential Diamond so that he can go back to his people as a politician again, serving the people regardless of their political affiliations or colours, be it "red" or "yellow", as he had done before as an independent. This time, with Unicity, he will have more power to help make life better for his people!
Khun Witthaya's entry and early success in Unicity represents a new breakthrough for Unipower. Having broken into many corporate boardrooms and upper echelons of Thai society, Unipower is now breaking into the corridors of political power.
This seasoned politician, a naturally powerful speaker on the Unipower Stage in Bangkok on Saturday, 16th January 2010 given his 7 years experience in the cut-and-thrust of Thai politics, enrolled into Unicity as a result of a dare!
His son sought to enrol dad, then out of the Thai Senate but still fraternising in political and high society. But dad feared a loss of face from associating with Network Marketing. He didn't want to be seen too near or inside a Unicity DSC (Distributor Service Centre). He'd rather wait in the car for the son to finish up for up to 2 hours.
When son persisted, Khun Witthaya challenged the son to produce the 100,000 baht monthly income he talked about being able to get before he would consider. The son produced the result, and father had to keep his word.
Khun Witthaya took the UPS stage as a new Senior Director in Unicity, after being in the business for just under one year. Based on the translation of what he said, and a brief chat I had with him at Rama Garden Resort the next day, I gathered that Khun Witthaya was fully attuned to all that happens in the Unipower system. He had humbled himself to go through all the training available - from the 8 Steps Basic Training to the Eagle Camp and others. He was there at the all-day training by the two Presidential Triple Diamonds Khun Joe and Khun Rasa on Sunday, 17th Jan 2010.
On the stage, Khun Witthaya spoke of how he learnt and mastered the 8 Steps, committed to being a Core Leader, worked the 10pts a day Passport of Success programme. As a result, he produced the success that qualified him to take the UPS Stage, and wowed the crowd like no other speaker did.
From the stage, he vowed to work his way up to Presidential Diamond, inspired by the empowering leadership and fine examples of Khun Joe and Khun Rasa. His ultimate dream? "After I have succeeded as a Presidential Diamond, I will go back to my people. I will serve my people again, regardless of political colours. This time, I will be able to do more for them as I can offer them an opportunity to make life better."
That is life after politics, and then, before too long, for Khun Witthaya, a 2nd lease of political life on completing the The Happy Life Project.
What great possibilities. Awesome.
Tuesday, January 05, 2010
The Key to Freedom
Would you like to have it? I have some to give away - both the physical "key" like this one in the picture as well as the conceptual key to freedom - financial freedom, time freedom and freedom from health concerns for the rest of your life. That's The Happy Life Project!
Sunday, January 03, 2010
Sunset in Phuket's Surin Beach
After the success of the 1st ever Unipower Seminar in Singapore on Dec 12th, I took my family for a make-up holiday in Phuket. It was a great holiday and this beautiful sunset captures one of our many great moments there.
It was a "make-up holiday" because we were supposed to have gone to Hongkong earlier in December, taking in a few nights at HK Disneyland, a trip to Macau and a stay at an exclusive private club which we had pre-booked almost a year in advance. But I had to cancel it because of bad timing. I couldn't possibly relax and enjoy a holiday in the week before the biggest ever event in our Unicity business ....
This Phuket trip, I could relax. Yan Ting, Jia Wei, Chris and I had fun and so did my brother in law Timothy and his family, Cally, Lucas, Hazel. Yes, it was a two-family holiday. The kids loved the extra company.
We spent hours by the beach, enjoying the clear waters of Surin, "goggling" at the marine creatures swimming among the corals. We collected hermit crabs. We went on an "island safari" and had the thrill of our life riding on elephants, ox-carts, well-polished buffalos and jeeps.. We just about managed to scrape some time to enjoy a good massage by the seaside. Speaking of massage, I should mention Yan Ting got a "massage" on her back from a show elephant, which used one of its legs. Brave girl.
We took in popular, bustling and busy Patong Beach and learnt from that excursion to appreciate even more the unspoilt beach where our hotel was located - Surin. That's where the beautiful sunset photo was taken. Truly beautiful, isn't it?
Tuesday, December 01, 2009
Wear Your Name With Pride: You're a Designer Brand!
Gucci. Hermes. Dolce & Gabbana. Louis Vutton. Versace. Then YOU! Your Name!
Yes, you could be a Designer Brand if you want to, I told 27 student leaders at Tanglin Secondary School yesterday during a 3-hour workshop that was part of their 2-day leadership camp.
All you need to do is to live your life by design, not by default. Know where have you been, know where you are today, know where you want to go, then go where you want to go. That makes for a Designer Life.
During the 3-hour session, I got the Student Council members to work through 3 exercises.
Exercise One, think and write one-liners for 3 questions: 1) My proudest achievement todate. 2) My biggest contribution as a student leader. 3) My purpose in life.
Exercise Two, answer two questions: 1) Who is or are your role models? 2) Who or what would you like to be if you could be whoever/whatever you wanted.
Exercise Three, what do you think is the ultimate life-skill, the skill of skills, that will set you up for life. (Write it down, then let's put all your ideas on the whiteboard, and vote on them in two stages.)
So, it was not a "I talk, you listen" session. That made sure that they won't sleep on me in class ;)
The responses were interesting, naturally.
Consider these responses to One: Overcoming the "high elements" (rock climbing) after having failed the first time. Being able to understand what my grandma is saying especially because she slurs badly. Being able to pass my maths finally, after having failed it before. Scoring full marks for this or that subject ...
How about these responses to Two? My biggest contribution as a student leader is raising the flag in front of the school assembly every morning (even though I feel nervous about standing in front of everyone). I like this one - playing the national anthem during assembly. On questioning, we found that all that was involved was pressing the play button!
This contribution reminds me of the story of the New York taxi driver in the book, You Inc, who does his work with so much pride and class and style, unlike the "typical New York taxi driver", that he becomes rich on the generous tips his customers give to him. He is also a happy man on the job.
Some said their biggest contribution as a student leader was to help clean up the Student Council room. Earlier, I had seen a number of them carting old sofas, chairs and even tables to a dumpsite behind the carpark.
I invited the students to think broader, deeper. What do you think about your biggest contribution as a student leader being none other than being "Me" or "The Best of Me". Imagine, my biggest contribution as student leader is Me and what I am, what I stand for, how I live and how I'd like to live out my future today.
Being a "better you" in whatever you do would already be a big contribution, and the beautiful thing is everybody is different. That way, everybody gets to make a unique contribution to whatever they are doing :)
My favourite response to Three, What is your purpose in life, is: "Make people happy in all that I do and put a smile on their faces."
Among the few that needed help were vague responses like this: To achieve my ideal dream. To achieve my goals.
The ideal dream and the goals were unspoken, also unwritten on checking. Hey, boys and girls, if you don't dare speak them out, you won't ever get them. When you do speak them out, be sure to make it specific, make it real, make it heart-felt. Make it sound like something you really like. Then, you are more likely to achieve your dreams or goals.
I was glad to have had this fun opportunity with the student councillors of Tanglin Seconday School
This has been a Service to New Generation project of the Rotary Club of Pandan Valley project. The group of 27 included a number of Interactors i.e. members of the Interact Club of Tanglin Sec. The teacher advisor, who sat through the session with a view to implementing this as a regular feature in the future, is Mr Tan Puay Eng.
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Anything is Possible, says the doctor
Please meet Sureerat Wongsiriluk, a doctor who spent a total of 10 years at top Thai universities learning first how to be a pharmacist and then how to be a doctor (because she decided she wasn't going to stay as a pharmacist), only to give it all up when she was introduced to Unicity.
Khun Sureerat a.k.a. Mo Jie decided that she didn't want to "grow old and fat working all my life in a small treatment room". When introduced to Unicity, she realized quickly (in 5 minutes) that this is what she's been looking for: A business where she doesn't have to do all the work and work all of her life.
Before Unicity, Dr Sureerat, 36 and a mother of a 3-year-old boy, was more than just a doctor. She was a business owner with a healthcare business comprising 3 clinics in different locations in Thailand.
Within one year of joining Unicity, Khun Sureerat became a Presidential Director, earning more than 400,000 baht (S$16,000) a month. Halfway through that journey, she was sure enough about her new business that she stopped being a medical practitioner (although she continues to be the owner of 2 remaining clinics).
Dr Sureerat, who was in Singapore under the Unipower Business School's monthly guest speaker programme, said the biggest thing she learnt after switching line was this idea: "ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE!".
She shared the story of another Presidential Director, former tour guide Khun Angel. A few days before the end of the month, Khun Angel had a 40k leg and a 20k leg but not the 10k leg needed to qualify as PD. He prayed, read a book for strength. Then, a downline showed up saying he wanted to be Director by month-end. Khun Angel spent all his time helping the downline, and by month-end, the downline was a Director earning 100,000baht (S$4,000) a month. Khun Angel finished as Presidential Director.
How about Dr Sureerat? How did she go from zero to 400,000 baht a month (S$16,000) under one year?
She said: "I started part-time, but worked full-heart. I followed the Unipower system 100% and worked with the KPI, checking 10 points of activities every day with the system's "Passport to Success".
I approached anyone and everyone. I showed the plan every day. I did the work without setting conditions. I showed the plan even at 2am at one time - for an ER (emergency room) nurse who finished work late.
I talk to my successful uplines everyday. I get them to answer my questions and solve my problems.
I was just being a student again. I listened to CDs of success stories every morning, before I went out to approach people. Listening to the CDs, and taking notes as I listened to the CDs, kept me strong.
I go out with the right mindset, that I am a giver, giving people something good for them. At 60, people retire from their income but not their expenses. We have something good to offer them."
Khun Sureerat personally recruited 18 500pv Fast Starts in her first month in the business. That took her to Director in Month 1 and Senior Director in Month 3.
"I just go about collecting "human assets" first. The results will show up after 6 months ... as the system promised," Mo Jie said. X = Y, indeed.
On handling rejections, the biggest challege for Khun Sureerat came from within the family. Her father. At first, he gave her his blessings, thinking it was only a part-time thing. However, when she closed the clinic for 3 days to go to Eagle Camp, and did the same again shortly thereafter so as to attend Unicity's global convention in Busan in September 2008, the father was angry and disappointed. They did not talk for a long time.
She invited him to join her on a reward trip to Sydney. He refused. He challenged her, saying he'd go only as a President's father. So, when she became Presidential Director, he had to tag along on a Star Cruise reward trip. He has since joined her, opening his own Unicity account and starting to recruit people!
Regarding people who say, "..but I don't like MLM", she advised, we should simply bring them back to "X = Y" and and ask, Do you like your work? No? But you still work at it! MLM is just like a job, except that the result (the Y) is very different. In MLM, we work a few hours a day and we can get a new track.
"It is not important what you think of the business. It may be your answer to The Happy Life."
Well said, Dr Sureerat. Well said!
Friday, October 16, 2009
Me & My Power Car
Mercedes Benz!!!! Until recently, I never thought I'd own one nor drive in one. When I think of Mercedes Benz, I think of old wealth, old men .... Apologies to all the uncles and the non-uncles who own and drive one. So, until recently, Mercedes Benz is not the car for me.
And then, some months ago, with the arrival of Unipower in our Unicity business, I was exposed to new information, not from the distributors of the car but ... I learnt that the Benz is the preferred (or recommended) car for Unipower's members on Unicity's President's Club. Why? Because it is a widely accepted symbol of success and achievement, that others can identify with and aspire to. Because it is one of the safest cars in the world, and as our life becomes more and more valuable, we need to protect it better.
I was prepared to change my mindset and my assumptions. It helps that the timing of my achievement and obligatory follow-the-system acquisition coincides with the launch of Mercedes Benz's new E Class. The new E Class spots a more contemporary youthful look, especially at the front and on the sides. The tyres come with sports rims. And there are so many fun cool features inside.
So, to all my people in The 5E Network, meet my new workhorse. It's for you. Join me in the club, the Singapore/Malaysia Mercedes Benz Club of Unicity. Make it soon :)
Thursday, September 03, 2009
Finally, the Breakthrough
After exactly 8 years in the business, I finally achieved the Breakthrough. At the end of August 2009, I took the first step into Unicity's President's Club as a first-time qualified Presidential Director. So thrilled were the corporate staff at the news that they wasted no time blowing up a personal portrait of mine and posted it on the notice ooard in the Unicity office with a congratulatory message to the first PD1 in Singapore in over 7 years:) See picture.
Too long, some might say. My thoughts do occasionally gravitate towards that idea, that we took too long, until I stop myself on realizing that everything happens for a reason.
"Diamonds" do not just happen. They occur only after extreme pressure applied over a period of time. If we want to speed up the process, and shorten the time period, we just step up the pressure. I've seen both - first, the protracted test that lasted more than 7 years, and then the higher-pressure approach involving ambitious goals and demanding timelines. Now, I'd not have been as open to the latter, and even enjoy the turbo-charged results-orientated process of the last 6 months, if I didn't first go through the "water torture" of the past.
This is an important moment for me and also for all the serious business builders in the Singapore/Malaysia market. As CEO Stewart Hughes puts it in his congratulatory email: "Please accept my heartiest congratulations for leading out and being the example all of Singapore and Malaysia needed to see: IT CAN BE DONE!"
In his email, Stewart also said: "By matching your ability and desire with the UniPower System and the Unicity products and plan you can achieve anything — more importantly you can help others achieve their most cherished dreams."
Very true. I've never felt more able to help others achieve their most cherished dreams than the past 5-6 months. It was during these recent months that I was blessed enough to become equipped with the ways and wisdom of the UniPower system, the brainchild of the Thai triple diamond Chavich Kim.
Certain people who had joined me before and dropped out too soon because they did not feel able to do what I did now rejoin me in the business and get going and start producing results within the first one or two months.
This breakthrough is possible only because of what has happened in the last 6 months, from March 2009 onwards. It is a prayer answered. So, i thank God for Godsents. For me, those Godsents have first been Unicity, 8 years ago, and recently, since March 2009, Khun Joe and the UniPower system.
Too long, some might say. My thoughts do occasionally gravitate towards that idea, that we took too long, until I stop myself on realizing that everything happens for a reason.
"Diamonds" do not just happen. They occur only after extreme pressure applied over a period of time. If we want to speed up the process, and shorten the time period, we just step up the pressure. I've seen both - first, the protracted test that lasted more than 7 years, and then the higher-pressure approach involving ambitious goals and demanding timelines. Now, I'd not have been as open to the latter, and even enjoy the turbo-charged results-orientated process of the last 6 months, if I didn't first go through the "water torture" of the past.
This is an important moment for me and also for all the serious business builders in the Singapore/Malaysia market. As CEO Stewart Hughes puts it in his congratulatory email: "Please accept my heartiest congratulations for leading out and being the example all of Singapore and Malaysia needed to see: IT CAN BE DONE!"
In his email, Stewart also said: "By matching your ability and desire with the UniPower System and the Unicity products and plan you can achieve anything — more importantly you can help others achieve their most cherished dreams."
Very true. I've never felt more able to help others achieve their most cherished dreams than the past 5-6 months. It was during these recent months that I was blessed enough to become equipped with the ways and wisdom of the UniPower system, the brainchild of the Thai triple diamond Chavich Kim.
Certain people who had joined me before and dropped out too soon because they did not feel able to do what I did now rejoin me in the business and get going and start producing results within the first one or two months.
This breakthrough is possible only because of what has happened in the last 6 months, from March 2009 onwards. It is a prayer answered. So, i thank God for Godsents. For me, those Godsents have first been Unicity, 8 years ago, and recently, since March 2009, Khun Joe and the UniPower system.
Thursday, August 13, 2009
Live Out Your Masterpiece, says mug
"Live one day at a time and make it a masterpiece," exhorts my favourite mug.
Yes, I said mug. M-U-G, mug :)
That's the encouraging and inspirational message that I get every morning when I sip Unicity's Bio Reishi Coffee from my favourite mug. It was the simple message on the mug that got my attention many years ago, and made me pick it up from the shelf, pay for it to bring it home to enjoy, every day.
I was inspired to share this daily message on my mug after I read the latest blog by "Miss Articulate" in her blogspot, "smile .. it confuses people".
She was sharing about the message on her mug, given to her by her dearest friend. The message reads:
happiness is like a butterfly:
the more you chase it, the more it will elude you,
but if you turn your attention to other things it will come
and sit softly on your shoulder....
- thoreau
Now, what does your mug say to you every morning?
Whatever it says or does not say,
"Live One day at a time
and make it a masterpiece"
Yes, I said mug. M-U-G, mug :)
That's the encouraging and inspirational message that I get every morning when I sip Unicity's Bio Reishi Coffee from my favourite mug. It was the simple message on the mug that got my attention many years ago, and made me pick it up from the shelf, pay for it to bring it home to enjoy, every day.
I was inspired to share this daily message on my mug after I read the latest blog by "Miss Articulate" in her blogspot, "smile .. it confuses people".
She was sharing about the message on her mug, given to her by her dearest friend. The message reads:
happiness is like a butterfly:
the more you chase it, the more it will elude you,
but if you turn your attention to other things it will come
and sit softly on your shoulder....
- thoreau
Now, what does your mug say to you every morning?
Whatever it says or does not say,
"Live One day at a time
and make it a masterpiece"
Sunday, June 28, 2009
Remembering the indomitable Tan Yoke Lane
Tan Yoke Lane @ Dan Yoke Lin (1939 - 1989) IS my late mom - a great woman, and mother of eight, who died too young, at the age of 50, long before she had the chance to enjoy the fully-grown fruits of her labour of love.
I remember getting a phone call from my elder brother in 1986, shortly before she was due to arrive in Singapore with my dad to witness my graduation from the National University of Singapore. Eng Hooi said, "Hai, bad news. Mom's got the Big C." It was nose or nasal cancer.
She battled the cancer for 3 years and in the end, despite chemotherapy at the Penang Medical Centre, succumbed. The cancer returned after a short remission, and quickly spread to her lungs.
I remember getting news of mom's death in September 1989. I was then a dealer-in-waiting at the stockbrokers JM Sassoon & Co. I was just starting out on a second career that turned out to be financially rewarding and that lasted 13 years. But mom didn't get to see or enjoy that success of mine, a success in which she had a big hand and which she'd have been proud of.
The best holiday I could afford to give her was a holiday in Bangkok, in July 1988, with dad, one of my sisters and my then girlfriend Chris. The only luxury I could afford then was a First Class train ticket, the one with sleeping berths, on the overnight train from our hometown Butterworth to Bangkok. I am glad we managed to do at least that.
Mom wanted to have grand children to hold, and said so, many times. The best I could do was to get married in January 1989, and shortly after, arranged for her to visit Chris and me and bless our new home, our own home, in Singapore. I wanted to bring her to places, but I remember, she was generally too weak to even catch glimpses of the sights I wanted to share with her, let alone enjoy the moment. But I am glad we tried, and have beautiful photos of those precious last days. Yes, that was the last time I saw her alive ...
Recently, as I reflected upon my recent triumphs and success as a business builder working in partnership with the wellness company, Unicity International, I couldn't help thinking about mom.
I remember when I first set out on my entrepreneurial journey in Unicity, I had resolved that when I am successful, I will either put up a building in her name or have a road named after her, and simply named Tan Yoke Lane. There shall be a plaque that tells the story of an indomitable spirit whom I believe will inspire many as it continues to inspire me, I thought.
Then, recently, I thought, why wait for that building or that road? I can very well dedicate my success todate and my success to come to her, and start telling people about her. And so I did - when I was given the opportunity to share my success story in Singapore and in Kuala Lumpur last week.
Mom's life spoke of a readiness to break out of the tried and tested and keep exploring and employing new ways of getting the better life.
I remember the love story of my mom and dad, how they met in my grandmother's coffeeshop in Kuala Lumpur. She was sewing when he walked up to chat her up. She poked him with a needle, and then regretted it when his finger bled. So, she nursed and bandaged the young man's finger. Love grew out of that encounter. Later, she'd eloped with dad to Penang because her parents did not approve of her getting married to a mere lorry driver.
For many years after that, mom would return to KL every year, bringing us, the kids, along, and doing everything to make sure that her parents knew that she had made the right decision and was living a better life. She would return to KL bearing gifts and food that testified to that.
Mom and dad were to raise a family with eight children, the first of whom died young at 7 and whom she would always want us to remember. The eldest of the 7 surviving siblings is today 50 and the youngest, 35. To do this well under the watchful eyes and critical tongues of many highly-opinionated in-laws, mom reinvented herself many times.
Mom went from being a laundry woman and seamstress to a baker, learning how to make the full range of local or Nyonya "kuihs" or cakes from my Peranakan sarong kebaya-clad grandma. Mom was good at them all - from the laborious ningao (sweet cake) to the angkukuih, kuih kapik (love letters), kuih talam ... You name it, she could do it, and did it famously well. We'd be inundated with orders every Chinese Year and on festive occasions. She also headed a tontine, or informal community lending and borrowing club, where people with excess money would lend to those with cashflow problems at interest rates of up to 20% or more. Our hometown would from time to time be abuzz with bad news of a tontine leader who ran off with people's money. But mom was a beacon of strength, integrity and trustworthiness. She never suffered a run even in the worst of times.
At the height of her constantly evolving and ever-changing economic career, mom was a chef par excellence. Her cooking was well known and in great demand. I remember how a customer bought her a return air ticket to get her to KL to cook for a wedding dinner. With just one big wok and a set of cooking utensils, mom set off for the airport and flew to KL to whip up an 8-course dinner for 300 people or 30 tables. She'd normally be assisted by no more than two assistant cooks and two dishwashers, the dishwashers being none other than the elder of my three then-still-young sisters.
After every such successful outing, we would witness the arrival of a new TV, or a new refrigerator or a new hi-fi system. Mom was the reason why we were able to move from the ancestral home (kong chu) in Butterworth to a government-built terrace house (a place we could call our own, and in which relatives have no say or claim) in Seberang Jaya in 1981. Mom was the reason why the family was able to upgrade from the bicycle as a means of transport to a car about the same time as the big move.
Where was my dad in all this? After his early days as a lorry driver, dad held a job at the local bus company, moving up from driver cum conductor on the Butterworth-Alor Star route to station master in Bukit Mertajam. He worked in the same company, as long as I was aware, until he retired. His highest salary was just over RM600. Even then when money was worth more, that sum could not provide for much.
Dad, now 78 and healthy, was into current affairs (I know for I'd listen to him talk expertly about the news or politics of the day) and was once an active trade unionist. But he was never ambitious, economically speaking. Nonetheless, dad was a good man who never did anything wrong, nothing that the family would be ashamed of, and he remains so. We love and respect him for that.
The picture I have is that dad would give no trouble, but apparently, he wasn't comfortable handling trouble either. Mom once told me, if there was any problem at home, financial or otherwise, she'd have to bear it alone. Dad would not be around to hear about it, and if he did, he wouldn't have the patience for the details.
So, there you are - a story of a Hainanese woman married into a "foreign" Hokkien-speaking territory, who'd have to single-handedly do, and bear, whatever it took to first, make sure her earlier decisions in life turned out right, and second, to get for herself and her family all the amenities and trappings of the good life.
It was mom who after a well-deserved holiday and tour of Singapore returned to tell me how beautiful and inspiring the Nanyang University campus was, and how I should study hard so that I'd get to a university like that one day. It was mom who many years later would put together all the financial resources necessary, including borrowing from close trusted friends, so that I could get higher education in Singapore. I did get to Nantah when it was just a hostel for NUS students and enjoyed the campus grounds mom had told me about.
Now, so much later in life, 20 years after her passing, I look back and have so much to be thankful for. Much of my being, my character, obviously draws upon my mom's inspired life - my tenacity and toughness in the face of challenges or obstacles; my preparedness to take charge or take the lead when situations demand it; my readiness to reinvent myself career-wise to ensure my family's economic well-being. While well-meaning people would ask, why did you give up your stockbroking career and go into something so different, I think nothing of it. I am adaptable, and can change according to circumstances, thanks to mom's example.
If I had to come up with one word to remember her by, the best word would be INDOMITABLE. That means: Unyielding, unswerving, unwavering, unconquerable, unflinching, unbeatable, irrepressible, unstoppable, invincible, resolute, determined, stubbornly persistent, steadfast, staunch, untiring, tireless, unflagging, undaunted, fearless, brave, courageous, plucky ... Yes, she was all that :)
It's a great pity mom is not alive today to listen to me talk proudly of her and boast about her life exploits in public. There is nothing I or anyone can do about that. She is gone. However, there is something I can do about the fact that she lived and loved - to tell her story so that others may be inspired by her as I have been and continue to be.
What's in this story for you?
1. Live life flexibly: Be prepared to get out of your comfort zone to go after what matters most to you; and when and where necessary, be ready to reinvent yourself so as to make life better for yourself and your family.
2. Don't take it all on alone if you can help it: While willing to change according to circumstances, do not run your life like a one-man or one-woman show, if you can help it. Given the choices of her times, my mom couldn't help being Superwoman. But today, with the opening up of the economy, and the abundance of opportunities with many people-friendly economic alternatives, we certainly can help it.
3. Watch the stress level in your life: The stress of raising a whole family all by yourself can kill. I often say: While conventional wisdom says "smoking causes cancer", dad was the one who smoked cigarettes (though no longer, for many years now) but it is my mom who died of cancer. The lesson in my mom's life story is that we ought to watch the stress level. More than anything else, I believe, it is stress - be it emotional, physical, mental or economic or all of that combined - that weakens the body and undermines our ability to ward off free radicals and harmful virus, germs or toxins.
4. Do not fight cancer with only conventional treatment: When my mom was in the midst of fighting cancer, a cousin sister once asked me, "Hai, so how? What else are you going to do about it?" I remember feeling guilty and helpless at the same time, wishing there was more I could do than just pooling our financial resources to finance the medical treatment.
I wish I was as well-informed then as I am today. Alas, we can't turn back the clock. What I can do is to make sure that my mom did not live, suffer and die in vain. What I will do now is to speak with a vengeance, telling people that we can prevent cancer, and in the unfortunate situation when it is past prevention, and someone is already afflicted, we can still give him or her real hope beyond the debilitating effects of conventional treatment.
To break the remission and relapse cycle, be open to using nutritonal supplements to boost the body's defences against free radicals and also to oxygenate and alkalinize the body. During my mom's fight, Unicity or its predecessor company, Enrich, hadn't even arrived in Malaysia. Unicity is here now, ready to serve with a wide array of health-boosting wellness products, proven capable of bringing cancer patients from hopelessness or near death to a new lease of life. I personally know of a few of these blessed people and have often used this to encourage others in the fight against cancer.
Go on. My mom didn't have the chance to live a long healthy life, free of the scourge and curse of cancer. You have. My mom didn't have the chance to make life better without having to do everything by herself and taking on all the stress of making ends meet by herself. You have.
Do something about it. I have, and I am.
All this I do and speak in the memory of my beloved mom.
Thank you Mom. I love you.
I remember getting a phone call from my elder brother in 1986, shortly before she was due to arrive in Singapore with my dad to witness my graduation from the National University of Singapore. Eng Hooi said, "Hai, bad news. Mom's got the Big C." It was nose or nasal cancer.
She battled the cancer for 3 years and in the end, despite chemotherapy at the Penang Medical Centre, succumbed. The cancer returned after a short remission, and quickly spread to her lungs.
I remember getting news of mom's death in September 1989. I was then a dealer-in-waiting at the stockbrokers JM Sassoon & Co. I was just starting out on a second career that turned out to be financially rewarding and that lasted 13 years. But mom didn't get to see or enjoy that success of mine, a success in which she had a big hand and which she'd have been proud of.
The best holiday I could afford to give her was a holiday in Bangkok, in July 1988, with dad, one of my sisters and my then girlfriend Chris. The only luxury I could afford then was a First Class train ticket, the one with sleeping berths, on the overnight train from our hometown Butterworth to Bangkok. I am glad we managed to do at least that.
Mom wanted to have grand children to hold, and said so, many times. The best I could do was to get married in January 1989, and shortly after, arranged for her to visit Chris and me and bless our new home, our own home, in Singapore. I wanted to bring her to places, but I remember, she was generally too weak to even catch glimpses of the sights I wanted to share with her, let alone enjoy the moment. But I am glad we tried, and have beautiful photos of those precious last days. Yes, that was the last time I saw her alive ...
Recently, as I reflected upon my recent triumphs and success as a business builder working in partnership with the wellness company, Unicity International, I couldn't help thinking about mom.
I remember when I first set out on my entrepreneurial journey in Unicity, I had resolved that when I am successful, I will either put up a building in her name or have a road named after her, and simply named Tan Yoke Lane. There shall be a plaque that tells the story of an indomitable spirit whom I believe will inspire many as it continues to inspire me, I thought.
Then, recently, I thought, why wait for that building or that road? I can very well dedicate my success todate and my success to come to her, and start telling people about her. And so I did - when I was given the opportunity to share my success story in Singapore and in Kuala Lumpur last week.
Mom's life spoke of a readiness to break out of the tried and tested and keep exploring and employing new ways of getting the better life.
I remember the love story of my mom and dad, how they met in my grandmother's coffeeshop in Kuala Lumpur. She was sewing when he walked up to chat her up. She poked him with a needle, and then regretted it when his finger bled. So, she nursed and bandaged the young man's finger. Love grew out of that encounter. Later, she'd eloped with dad to Penang because her parents did not approve of her getting married to a mere lorry driver.
For many years after that, mom would return to KL every year, bringing us, the kids, along, and doing everything to make sure that her parents knew that she had made the right decision and was living a better life. She would return to KL bearing gifts and food that testified to that.
Mom and dad were to raise a family with eight children, the first of whom died young at 7 and whom she would always want us to remember. The eldest of the 7 surviving siblings is today 50 and the youngest, 35. To do this well under the watchful eyes and critical tongues of many highly-opinionated in-laws, mom reinvented herself many times.
Mom went from being a laundry woman and seamstress to a baker, learning how to make the full range of local or Nyonya "kuihs" or cakes from my Peranakan sarong kebaya-clad grandma. Mom was good at them all - from the laborious ningao (sweet cake) to the angkukuih, kuih kapik (love letters), kuih talam ... You name it, she could do it, and did it famously well. We'd be inundated with orders every Chinese Year and on festive occasions. She also headed a tontine, or informal community lending and borrowing club, where people with excess money would lend to those with cashflow problems at interest rates of up to 20% or more. Our hometown would from time to time be abuzz with bad news of a tontine leader who ran off with people's money. But mom was a beacon of strength, integrity and trustworthiness. She never suffered a run even in the worst of times.
At the height of her constantly evolving and ever-changing economic career, mom was a chef par excellence. Her cooking was well known and in great demand. I remember how a customer bought her a return air ticket to get her to KL to cook for a wedding dinner. With just one big wok and a set of cooking utensils, mom set off for the airport and flew to KL to whip up an 8-course dinner for 300 people or 30 tables. She'd normally be assisted by no more than two assistant cooks and two dishwashers, the dishwashers being none other than the elder of my three then-still-young sisters.
After every such successful outing, we would witness the arrival of a new TV, or a new refrigerator or a new hi-fi system. Mom was the reason why we were able to move from the ancestral home (kong chu) in Butterworth to a government-built terrace house (a place we could call our own, and in which relatives have no say or claim) in Seberang Jaya in 1981. Mom was the reason why the family was able to upgrade from the bicycle as a means of transport to a car about the same time as the big move.
Where was my dad in all this? After his early days as a lorry driver, dad held a job at the local bus company, moving up from driver cum conductor on the Butterworth-Alor Star route to station master in Bukit Mertajam. He worked in the same company, as long as I was aware, until he retired. His highest salary was just over RM600. Even then when money was worth more, that sum could not provide for much.
Dad, now 78 and healthy, was into current affairs (I know for I'd listen to him talk expertly about the news or politics of the day) and was once an active trade unionist. But he was never ambitious, economically speaking. Nonetheless, dad was a good man who never did anything wrong, nothing that the family would be ashamed of, and he remains so. We love and respect him for that.
The picture I have is that dad would give no trouble, but apparently, he wasn't comfortable handling trouble either. Mom once told me, if there was any problem at home, financial or otherwise, she'd have to bear it alone. Dad would not be around to hear about it, and if he did, he wouldn't have the patience for the details.
So, there you are - a story of a Hainanese woman married into a "foreign" Hokkien-speaking territory, who'd have to single-handedly do, and bear, whatever it took to first, make sure her earlier decisions in life turned out right, and second, to get for herself and her family all the amenities and trappings of the good life.
It was mom who after a well-deserved holiday and tour of Singapore returned to tell me how beautiful and inspiring the Nanyang University campus was, and how I should study hard so that I'd get to a university like that one day. It was mom who many years later would put together all the financial resources necessary, including borrowing from close trusted friends, so that I could get higher education in Singapore. I did get to Nantah when it was just a hostel for NUS students and enjoyed the campus grounds mom had told me about.
Now, so much later in life, 20 years after her passing, I look back and have so much to be thankful for. Much of my being, my character, obviously draws upon my mom's inspired life - my tenacity and toughness in the face of challenges or obstacles; my preparedness to take charge or take the lead when situations demand it; my readiness to reinvent myself career-wise to ensure my family's economic well-being. While well-meaning people would ask, why did you give up your stockbroking career and go into something so different, I think nothing of it. I am adaptable, and can change according to circumstances, thanks to mom's example.
If I had to come up with one word to remember her by, the best word would be INDOMITABLE. That means: Unyielding, unswerving, unwavering, unconquerable, unflinching, unbeatable, irrepressible, unstoppable, invincible, resolute, determined, stubbornly persistent, steadfast, staunch, untiring, tireless, unflagging, undaunted, fearless, brave, courageous, plucky ... Yes, she was all that :)
It's a great pity mom is not alive today to listen to me talk proudly of her and boast about her life exploits in public. There is nothing I or anyone can do about that. She is gone. However, there is something I can do about the fact that she lived and loved - to tell her story so that others may be inspired by her as I have been and continue to be.
What's in this story for you?
1. Live life flexibly: Be prepared to get out of your comfort zone to go after what matters most to you; and when and where necessary, be ready to reinvent yourself so as to make life better for yourself and your family.
2. Don't take it all on alone if you can help it: While willing to change according to circumstances, do not run your life like a one-man or one-woman show, if you can help it. Given the choices of her times, my mom couldn't help being Superwoman. But today, with the opening up of the economy, and the abundance of opportunities with many people-friendly economic alternatives, we certainly can help it.
3. Watch the stress level in your life: The stress of raising a whole family all by yourself can kill. I often say: While conventional wisdom says "smoking causes cancer", dad was the one who smoked cigarettes (though no longer, for many years now) but it is my mom who died of cancer. The lesson in my mom's life story is that we ought to watch the stress level. More than anything else, I believe, it is stress - be it emotional, physical, mental or economic or all of that combined - that weakens the body and undermines our ability to ward off free radicals and harmful virus, germs or toxins.
4. Do not fight cancer with only conventional treatment: When my mom was in the midst of fighting cancer, a cousin sister once asked me, "Hai, so how? What else are you going to do about it?" I remember feeling guilty and helpless at the same time, wishing there was more I could do than just pooling our financial resources to finance the medical treatment.
I wish I was as well-informed then as I am today. Alas, we can't turn back the clock. What I can do is to make sure that my mom did not live, suffer and die in vain. What I will do now is to speak with a vengeance, telling people that we can prevent cancer, and in the unfortunate situation when it is past prevention, and someone is already afflicted, we can still give him or her real hope beyond the debilitating effects of conventional treatment.
To break the remission and relapse cycle, be open to using nutritonal supplements to boost the body's defences against free radicals and also to oxygenate and alkalinize the body. During my mom's fight, Unicity or its predecessor company, Enrich, hadn't even arrived in Malaysia. Unicity is here now, ready to serve with a wide array of health-boosting wellness products, proven capable of bringing cancer patients from hopelessness or near death to a new lease of life. I personally know of a few of these blessed people and have often used this to encourage others in the fight against cancer.
Go on. My mom didn't have the chance to live a long healthy life, free of the scourge and curse of cancer. You have. My mom didn't have the chance to make life better without having to do everything by herself and taking on all the stress of making ends meet by herself. You have.
Do something about it. I have, and I am.
All this I do and speak in the memory of my beloved mom.
Thank you Mom. I love you.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Lord, thanks for the powerful winds of change!
Happily, I'd like to continue the blogpost of March 13.
I am glad I learnt from God's Eagle - not to be afraid of adversity or challenges, nor to flee from them, but instead, to position myself to take them on, and harness the power of the winds of change to soar higher than ever before.
The challengers turn out to be friends sent by God(see the picture), with signs to make sure we do not doubt that, and the enemies and detractors were forced by divine circumstances to be come friends and willing co-workers, lending their numbers and energies to lift us all higher.
WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!! God is truly GREAT!!
Friends, I've never enjoyed as much effortless success as I have since March 19th - the day things all turned around in my favour, from what seemed like a low point to a series of high points in our business development efforts. This is only the beginning of a new beginning ......
Friday, March 13, 2009
Eagles welcome storms, soar over them
Thank God for creating a magnificent creature like the eagle from which we can draw so many powerful life lessons. One of these has just become especially meaningful to me, empowering me to face off one of the biggest challenges ever in my professional life. You have those challenges yourself, don't you? If so, consider this:
The eagle is not afraid of storms. It expects them.
The eagle can sense a storm coming well in advance.
It does not flee from the bad winds coming towards it. Instead, it positions itself, either on a mountain perch or in mid-air, waiting fearlessly for them.
As the winds blow in, the eagle spreads its wings, in all their magnificant glory, and let the winds blow against its wings.
In so doing, it harnesses the power of the storm to lift itself higher, soaring over the gale.
What a beautiful picture of how we can thrive in adversity and overcome our enemies or detractors, rising above them.
So, fear not. Fly high no matter what obstacles and challenges come our way.
Let challenges strengthen our resolve, sharpen our fighting edge.
Thank God for the Eagles indeed!
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