What do I stand for?
I stand for The Happy Life Project, and all the great possibilities that it offers to people who can see, or envision, those possibilities.
I stand for the Unicity Opportunity, and its powers to Make Life Better for people all over the world.
I stand for the Unipower system for success - a system that levels the playing field, and enables people regardless of their prior capabilities and socio-economic background, to get any extraordinary results that they can freely set their minds and hearts on.
I stand for the great possibilities that I see for myself and my family - the result, the success, and the lifestyle of a Diamond-rank distributor, to be achieved before the September 2012 Korea Global Leadership Summit.
I stand for the Possibilities and the Success of everybody who choose to succeed in life through The Happy Life Project.
I am the Source and the Cause of all that matters in my life, everything that I wish to create in the days, the months and the years ahead.
I choose to be Responsible, 100%, for everything that happens, and everything that doesn't happen. I give up having anybody, anything or any circumstances to blame, whatever happens.
I am powerful, as the empowered, as well as the empowerer.
I am a Go Giver. I choose to be one, and I claim the results and possibilities of the Laws of Stratospheric Success. That means, I give great value in every human encounter - much more than I expect in payment; I serve many across many territories in our borderless world; I deeply care for others and focus on what really matters to them; I contribute the best of myself, my authentic self, in every situation; and I am ever ready to receive even as I give whatever I can.
In my pursuit of success in life, I acknowledge that I already enjoy the abundance and blessings of God, my Lord, Jesus Christ. I also acknowledge the leverage power of the 4 Partners - Unicity the Make Life Better Company, Unipower the people-enabling system, the Unipower Team, and myself. God and the 4 Partners make the Big Game, light work.
I am Lim Eng Hai, and these are what I stand for. What about you????
Showing posts with label Learning from the Masters. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Learning from the Masters. Show all posts
Monday, March 12, 2012
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Diamonds!!!! Don't miss those right under your feet!
In the course of building my Network and coaching new people in setting up their own global distribution franchise, specialising in products that address everybody's everyday health concerns, I often come across new distributors who get very excited about the potential of opening up exciting new markets. Like Thailand? Indonesia? India? China? Europe?
Whenever I have the chance, I'd advise these new apprentices against flying here, flying there and flying everywhere. Usually, the price of doing all that is disappoinment - massive costly disappointment. We're all familiar with the saying, "Rolling stones gather no moss". It is true. I've been there, done that. It's confirmed, as if I needed to :)
Besides, how can we build in other people's country if we don't first build well in our own? Furthermore, it takes a Turk, not a German, to build the Turkey market. I am quoting Gursel Ayikbaba, a handsome, battle-hardened Turkish leader sponsored into the business in Germany by the Diamond from Nurenberg, Gerhard Reuhausser, both of whom I had the privilege of meeting in Bangkok recently.
The story that captures and conveys, tells and retells, this advice best is the story about The Acres of Diamonds. Here, I quote a recent re-telling of the story in an email from Bob Proctor's Insight of the Day based on excerpts from a radio show, Our Changing World,
by Earl Nightingale, 1921-1989, author of The Strangest Secret.
"Acres of Diamonds
One of the most interesting Americans who lived in the 19th century was a man by the name of Russell Herman Conwell. He was born in 1843 and lived until 1925. He was a lawyer for about 15 years until he became a clergyman.
One day, a young man went to him and told him he wanted a college education but couldn't swing it financially. Dr Conwell decided, at that moment, what his aim in life was, besides being a man of the cloth - that is. He decided to build a university for unfortunate, but deserving, students. He did have a challenge however. He would need a few million dollars to build the university. For Dr Conwell, and anyone with real purpose in life, nothing could stand in the way of his goal.
Several years before this incident, Dr Conwell was tremendously intrigued by a true story - with its ageless moral. The story was about a farmer who lived in Africa and through a visitor became tremendusly excited about looking for diamonds. Diamonds were already discovered in abundance on the African continent and the farmer got so excited about the idea of millions of dollars worth of diamonds that he sold his farm to head out to the diamond line. He wandered all over the continent, as the years slipped by, constantly searching for diamonds, wealth he never found. Eventualy, he went completely broke and threw himself into a river and drowned.
Meanwhile, the new owner of his farm picked up an unusual looking rock about the size of a country egg and put it on his mantle as a sort of curiosity. A visitor stopped by and in viewing the rock practically went into terminal convulsions. He told the new owner of the farm that the funny looking rock on his mantle was about the biggest diamond that had ever been found. The new owner of the farm said, "Heck, the whole farm is covered with them" - and sure enough it was.
The farm turned out to be Kimberley Diamond Mine .. the richest the world has ever know. The original farmer was literally standing on "Acres of Diamonds" until he sold his farm.
Dr Conwell learned from the story of the farmer and continued to teach its moral. Each of us is right in the middle of our own "Acres of Diamonds", if only we would realize it and develop the ground we are standing on before charging off in search of greener pastures. Dr Conwell told this story many times and attracted enormous audiences. He told the story long enough to have raised the money to start the college for underprivileged deserving students. In fact, he raised 6 million dollars and the university he founded, Temple University in Philadelphia, has at least ten degree-granting colleges and six other schools.
When Dr Russel H Conwell talked about each of us being right on our own "Acres of Diamonds", he meant it. This story does not get old .. it will be true forever.
Opportunity does not just come along - it is there all the time - we just have to see it."
Whenever I have the chance, I'd advise these new apprentices against flying here, flying there and flying everywhere. Usually, the price of doing all that is disappoinment - massive costly disappointment. We're all familiar with the saying, "Rolling stones gather no moss". It is true. I've been there, done that. It's confirmed, as if I needed to :)
Besides, how can we build in other people's country if we don't first build well in our own? Furthermore, it takes a Turk, not a German, to build the Turkey market. I am quoting Gursel Ayikbaba, a handsome, battle-hardened Turkish leader sponsored into the business in Germany by the Diamond from Nurenberg, Gerhard Reuhausser, both of whom I had the privilege of meeting in Bangkok recently.
The story that captures and conveys, tells and retells, this advice best is the story about The Acres of Diamonds. Here, I quote a recent re-telling of the story in an email from Bob Proctor's Insight of the Day based on excerpts from a radio show, Our Changing World,
by Earl Nightingale, 1921-1989, author of The Strangest Secret.
"Acres of Diamonds
One of the most interesting Americans who lived in the 19th century was a man by the name of Russell Herman Conwell. He was born in 1843 and lived until 1925. He was a lawyer for about 15 years until he became a clergyman.
One day, a young man went to him and told him he wanted a college education but couldn't swing it financially. Dr Conwell decided, at that moment, what his aim in life was, besides being a man of the cloth - that is. He decided to build a university for unfortunate, but deserving, students. He did have a challenge however. He would need a few million dollars to build the university. For Dr Conwell, and anyone with real purpose in life, nothing could stand in the way of his goal.
Several years before this incident, Dr Conwell was tremendously intrigued by a true story - with its ageless moral. The story was about a farmer who lived in Africa and through a visitor became tremendusly excited about looking for diamonds. Diamonds were already discovered in abundance on the African continent and the farmer got so excited about the idea of millions of dollars worth of diamonds that he sold his farm to head out to the diamond line. He wandered all over the continent, as the years slipped by, constantly searching for diamonds, wealth he never found. Eventualy, he went completely broke and threw himself into a river and drowned.
Meanwhile, the new owner of his farm picked up an unusual looking rock about the size of a country egg and put it on his mantle as a sort of curiosity. A visitor stopped by and in viewing the rock practically went into terminal convulsions. He told the new owner of the farm that the funny looking rock on his mantle was about the biggest diamond that had ever been found. The new owner of the farm said, "Heck, the whole farm is covered with them" - and sure enough it was.
The farm turned out to be Kimberley Diamond Mine .. the richest the world has ever know. The original farmer was literally standing on "Acres of Diamonds" until he sold his farm.
Dr Conwell learned from the story of the farmer and continued to teach its moral. Each of us is right in the middle of our own "Acres of Diamonds", if only we would realize it and develop the ground we are standing on before charging off in search of greener pastures. Dr Conwell told this story many times and attracted enormous audiences. He told the story long enough to have raised the money to start the college for underprivileged deserving students. In fact, he raised 6 million dollars and the university he founded, Temple University in Philadelphia, has at least ten degree-granting colleges and six other schools.
When Dr Russel H Conwell talked about each of us being right on our own "Acres of Diamonds", he meant it. This story does not get old .. it will be true forever.
Opportunity does not just come along - it is there all the time - we just have to see it."
Sunday, April 18, 2010
3 Things That Make A Leader Great
On April 4th 2010, I had the privilege of sitting in a hotel ballroom with thousands of others to listen to and learn from some of the greatest leaders in the Unipower Team. Here, I'd like to share what I picked up from one of them - Khun Phawadon Nasareerat, a Presidential Double Diamond and the youngest ever Unicity Diamond at 33. What was extra remarkable about his achievement was that this former public health ministry officer who was part-timing as an aerobics instructor achieved it in 3 years.
The photo shows some of us who went to Bangkok for the UPS weekend with Khun Phawadon and his new, free company-sponsored Porsche - his reward for building up a Double Diamond rank organization!
We were on our way out to get a cab after the all-day UPS Advanced Leadership Training at Rama Garden Resort on April 4th when we heard someone call out my name from the dark. It was Khun Phawadon, all dressed in black, standing in the dark under a tree (which explains why we didn't spot him before he spotted us) - next to his brand new black Porsche.
It was so nice of him to call out to us, and then, to patiently take many photos with us, individually and as a group.
Earlier in the day, Khun Phawadon spoke on the three qualities of "a legendary leader", in the league of CEO Stewart Hughes and Triple Diamond Khun Rasa. If you want to be a geat leader, have a heart for others, he said. "Having a position or the rank won't get you there; having a heart for others would."
The three things that make a legendary leader, according to Khun Phawadon, and which we created the opportunity to revisit, review, contemplate and internalize in Singapore yesterday, are:
1) Give - Be a Giver: Have the spirit, the heart and the mindset of a Giver, giving and contributing unconditionally without expecting something in return. Having the heart of a Giver helps when we go out prospecting, sharing with people the Happy Life Project, and also, when we work as a Team to make a success out of every event created to support the success of our people. A Giver doesn't stop nor get discouraged when people say "No" to our opportunity, or seem to fail to notice our contributions. A Giver contributes freely anyway, without calculating or holding back for a direct benefit.
2) Stand - Be a standpoint for your people. Stand up for your people. Stand up for what is right and what is good for them. Our people may not always agree with what we advise or advocate, but we, as the standard setter, must keep doing, sharing and promoting what is right to do, not just what we or they like to do. Set the standard that our people will look up to and that would lift them up in their lives and in their business. Let's be there for others - be other-centred; not self-centred.
3) Change - Be prepared, be willing and be ready to change. Start by changing our dressing, our attitude, our mindset, our being. Change the way we talk and the way we lead. Do not resist change. Go for all the functions or events recommended for people and leaders to achieve personal breakthroughs and transformation. Dare to change, whether or not you like it, for the sake of others. Again, let's do what is right, not just what we like.
So, let's Give, let's Stand and let's Change! A huge thanks to K. Phawadon for sharing his wisdom - a wisdom well beyond his youth, and which must have come from working the ground, building his now-gushing pipeline.
Tuesday, April 06, 2010
The Happy People
Having fun, feeling happy and at home in Khun Joe's home in the Masterpiece Village, Bangkok
She, the Cause of the Happiness of Hundreds
Just back from another Unipower Seminar in Bangkok on 3rd April, I cannot help but marvel at how our amazing business can truly Make Life Better for people from all walks of life, so thoroughly, so completely.
At the latest UPS weekend, on April 3rd-4th, 10,000 people were inspired by the brand new success stories of four guest speakers - a high-profile business owner Khun Kiin, a little-educated seashell vendor Khun Tik, a young career police officer Khun Neh, and a playful, "good for nothing" dish-washing son of a hawker who is now a young Presidential Director, Khun Nikhom Jaima.
Here, let me introduce you to just one of them - Khun Tik (see photo), the little-educated woman who sold seashells (clams, cockles, mussels and the like, I presume) in the market.
Khun Tik, who is in her 40s, is a mother of 2 with little education, a 4th Grader. Her education was disrupted when her school closed down when she was only in the 4th grade. She started working at the age of 12, selling things in the market. That's the only way she knew how to make money.
From young, she recognized the importance of money. "Money is needed to make life better". How to make more money? Work harder. So, for 20 years, she would work very hard, setting up stall in the morning market and then, in the afternoon, setting up stall in the afternoon market so as to make more money. She'd do this every day for 10 years, then 20 years.
"I am my own boss. I got money but I am not rich," she said. "I also had no time for my children." During the festivals, the kids would ask for her time. But those would be the best time to do more business. She felt bad, but she couldn't help but continue to make the same trade-off - time (from the kids) for money (to feed the children, and also her mother, who became her responsibility after her father died). Over time, her health suffered.
When introduced to the Unicity Happy Life Project, Khun Tik realized that it offered just what she needed - money, time and health.
"I cannot read, I cannot write, but I know what's in the Unipower system - the KPI, the passport to success. Whatever I didn't understand, I'd just ask my upline. I only needed to follow."
"I remember one situation when I felt fear. I was doubtful. So, I called my upline who was elsewhere. He encouraged me, telling me that I am good enough, that I can do what I had to do, and that it's OK, I should just go do it." As a result of following that advice, Khun Tik got to recruit and build a Cambodian team. They were in the hall on April 3rd, waving the Cambodian flag in grattitude and admiration for her, their leader.
Khun Tik made a hard decision early on in in her Unicity business. "I learnt that I cannot ride on two horses at one time. So I made the decision early in my business to close my stall. I became a Director in 4 months."
Now, she is a Senior Director. "What does that mean? I don't know. All I know is that I make THB100,000 a month! Also, now, I have time to see my kids. I have better health." (THB100,00 works out to over S$4,000 - a big sum of money in Thailand).
Khun Tik remembers well and takes to heart the advice that she received from everyone of her big leaders. She remembered being touched by the the kind first words of Presidential Triple Diamond Khun Rasa to her: "Do you know that you can be the cause of success and happiness for hundreds of people?"
She remembered being encouraged by another advice: "We don't need smart people. We just need people with strong hearts."
In closing, Khun Tik wisely said, life is about choices, and encouraged everyone to make the right choice. Choice #1, Do the work first then play. Choice #2, Play first then do the work. Choice #3, Play Play and Play and don't work. "I chose the first one," she said.
One of the most powerful thoughts that Khun Tik shared was the significance of a butterfly. "The butterfly in flapping its little wings sends out waves across the universe." We can make a big difference in the life of others.
Now, if Khun Tik can do it, why not you? Be inspired, to do something about your life, and the lives of those dear to you.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Fisher Boy: From abject poverty to a life of luxuries in 6 months
Please meet Khun Num, a 21-year-old, whose personal success story kills all the excuses that people can possibly make for not making a success of their lives. You know, one of the choices in life, to make money or make excuses? Khun Num's story helps us make the right choice.
Khun Num hails from the southern Thai province of Surat Thani. His father, the breadwinner of his family, died when he was still very young, of pre-school age. To help his family out, and to see himself through school, he had to start working from the young age of 10. Khun Num would work by night, going out to sea with the fishermen, and in the day, he would go to school like all the other kids.
However, he'd have to walk miles to school for that was the only "transport" he could afford. On the way, he would look longingly, and often hungrily, at the food plied along the way, but he would have to settle for the only staple his family could afford - instant noodles, which he got to eat only when he reached home.
To people who heard his story, he came to be known as Noodle Boy and to me, the Fisher Boy.
When he reached high school age, Khun Num wanted to secure for himself a brighter future. He wanted to enroll himself into a technical school. But the school fees were too high. That didn't stop him from opening his mouth or what some people would say, "trying his luck". Well, he got lucky! He approached the school, declared his interest but pleaded that he had only a little money to afford a portion of the fees. The school, moved by his plea, and probably his quiet but steely determination (which remains evident today), agreed to take him in, letting him pay only what he could afford!
Some 6 months ago, in mid-2009, someone from the Unipower team in Unicity Thailand approached him, asking, "Do you want to be rich?". Sure, he does. But how? He was advised, he'd not be given the fish, that means no financial help. But he'd be taught how to catch the fish, by the best teachers. Khun Num was game, and willing to learn.
Given his meagre resources, he had to struggle every step of the way, but the difficulties never stop him. Money was needed at every step of the way - opening an account with Unicity with 500 baht, buying his first two products to try - Nature's Tea and Super Chlorophyll, collecting enough orders (equivalent to over S$1,000) to upgrade his account to a Fast Start account earning higher commission of up to 20-30%, purchasing the Business Owner's Pack, enrolling for the 3-day Eagle Camp, visiting Bangkok to behold his new future in the UPS.
He epitomises the Friedrich Nietzche wisdom, "He who has a why to live for can bear almost 'any how'".
Just half a year later, on 16 January 2010, Khun Num was to stand on the UPS (Unipower Seminar) Stage, in front of more than 10,000 people. That's when I first heard his amazing story. He shared his success and how he had achieved a high income of 50,000 baht (over S$2,000) a month. He was a picture of confidence and grattitude to the many great teachers who showed him the way, and the Unipower system.
On March 20th 2010, I met Khun Num in person, face to face, in Dubai, during our all expenses paid Unicity reward holiday. I learnt from his upline and leader, Presidential Ruby Khun Nagorn (first right in the photo), that the stay at the Atlantis Paradise Hotel was another of Khun Num's personal vision realized.
As he was building up his vision of the future, he came across a video of the Atlantis Paradise of Dubai. He then said to himself, he'd certainly like to go there for a holiday one day. That dream, which predated Unicity's Dubai trip announcement, has so very quickly become reality for Khun Num.
Other dreams will be realized as this very pleasant fellow, who walks ramrod straight with quiet confidence and a ready smile, continues to walk steadily and consistently towards his new life.
Everytime I think or talk about Khun Num, I can't help feeling that that his personal triumph over adversities - his quick rise from poverty to a life of riches and exciting new possibilities, with the help of Unicity the company and Unipower the people-enabling business-building system - simply empowers others to succeed. His story takes away all the excuses from our doing whatever we have to, to get the life that we want.
Be Inspired. Be Blessed!
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
You Can Do It: Be the Success that You Dream of
We don't have to be clever and figure everything out by ourselves. The greatest wisdoms have been retold and retold for generations. Pick and choose something that makes you better, happier.
Pick a favourite or two or more from the following "Bob Proctor's Insights of the Day" which I have selected from my collection for you to consider and internalize (i.e. to make a part of you)...
"If I accept you as you are, I will make you worse; however, if I treat you as though you are what you are capable of becoming, I help you become that." - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, 1749-1832, Author and Philosopher
"Perhaps the most valuable result of all education is the ability to make yourself do the thing you have to do, when it ought to be done, whether you like it or not; it is the first lesson that ought to be learned; and however early a man's training begins, it is probably the last lesson that he learns thoroughly." - Thomas H. Huxley
1825-1895, Biologist
"There comes a moment when you have to stop revving up the car and shove it into gear." - David Mahoney, Executive and Philanthropist
"Don't waste your life in doubts and fears: spend yourself on the work before you, well assured that the right performance of this hour's duties will be the best preparation for the hours or ages that follow it." - Ralph Waldo Emerson, 1803-1882, Poet and Essayist
"Those with goals tend to succeed because they are focused and know where they are going, while those without goals do not." - Ted Karam, Author
"You don't get to choose how you're going to die. Or when. You can only decide how you're going to live. Now." - Joan Baez, Singer, Songwriter and Activist
"The big secret in life is that there is no secret. Whatever your goal, you can get there if you are willing to work. It is called massive action. Action is the gas in the tank. Without it, the car will not run." - Marcy Blochowiak, Author of No Glass Ceiling
So, choose. Choose whoever, whatever you have always wanted to be and to do. Then, just Be, just Do.
You Can Do It!
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Anything is Possible, says the doctor
Please meet Sureerat Wongsiriluk, a doctor who spent a total of 10 years at top Thai universities learning first how to be a pharmacist and then how to be a doctor (because she decided she wasn't going to stay as a pharmacist), only to give it all up when she was introduced to Unicity.
Khun Sureerat a.k.a. Mo Jie decided that she didn't want to "grow old and fat working all my life in a small treatment room". When introduced to Unicity, she realized quickly (in 5 minutes) that this is what she's been looking for: A business where she doesn't have to do all the work and work all of her life.
Before Unicity, Dr Sureerat, 36 and a mother of a 3-year-old boy, was more than just a doctor. She was a business owner with a healthcare business comprising 3 clinics in different locations in Thailand.
Within one year of joining Unicity, Khun Sureerat became a Presidential Director, earning more than 400,000 baht (S$16,000) a month. Halfway through that journey, she was sure enough about her new business that she stopped being a medical practitioner (although she continues to be the owner of 2 remaining clinics).
Dr Sureerat, who was in Singapore under the Unipower Business School's monthly guest speaker programme, said the biggest thing she learnt after switching line was this idea: "ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE!".
She shared the story of another Presidential Director, former tour guide Khun Angel. A few days before the end of the month, Khun Angel had a 40k leg and a 20k leg but not the 10k leg needed to qualify as PD. He prayed, read a book for strength. Then, a downline showed up saying he wanted to be Director by month-end. Khun Angel spent all his time helping the downline, and by month-end, the downline was a Director earning 100,000baht (S$4,000) a month. Khun Angel finished as Presidential Director.
How about Dr Sureerat? How did she go from zero to 400,000 baht a month (S$16,000) under one year?
She said: "I started part-time, but worked full-heart. I followed the Unipower system 100% and worked with the KPI, checking 10 points of activities every day with the system's "Passport to Success".
I approached anyone and everyone. I showed the plan every day. I did the work without setting conditions. I showed the plan even at 2am at one time - for an ER (emergency room) nurse who finished work late.
I talk to my successful uplines everyday. I get them to answer my questions and solve my problems.
I was just being a student again. I listened to CDs of success stories every morning, before I went out to approach people. Listening to the CDs, and taking notes as I listened to the CDs, kept me strong.
I go out with the right mindset, that I am a giver, giving people something good for them. At 60, people retire from their income but not their expenses. We have something good to offer them."
Khun Sureerat personally recruited 18 500pv Fast Starts in her first month in the business. That took her to Director in Month 1 and Senior Director in Month 3.
"I just go about collecting "human assets" first. The results will show up after 6 months ... as the system promised," Mo Jie said. X = Y, indeed.
On handling rejections, the biggest challege for Khun Sureerat came from within the family. Her father. At first, he gave her his blessings, thinking it was only a part-time thing. However, when she closed the clinic for 3 days to go to Eagle Camp, and did the same again shortly thereafter so as to attend Unicity's global convention in Busan in September 2008, the father was angry and disappointed. They did not talk for a long time.
She invited him to join her on a reward trip to Sydney. He refused. He challenged her, saying he'd go only as a President's father. So, when she became Presidential Director, he had to tag along on a Star Cruise reward trip. He has since joined her, opening his own Unicity account and starting to recruit people!
Regarding people who say, "..but I don't like MLM", she advised, we should simply bring them back to "X = Y" and and ask, Do you like your work? No? But you still work at it! MLM is just like a job, except that the result (the Y) is very different. In MLM, we work a few hours a day and we can get a new track.
"It is not important what you think of the business. It may be your answer to The Happy Life."
Well said, Dr Sureerat. Well said!
Thursday, September 03, 2009
Finally, the Breakthrough
After exactly 8 years in the business, I finally achieved the Breakthrough. At the end of August 2009, I took the first step into Unicity's President's Club as a first-time qualified Presidential Director. So thrilled were the corporate staff at the news that they wasted no time blowing up a personal portrait of mine and posted it on the notice ooard in the Unicity office with a congratulatory message to the first PD1 in Singapore in over 7 years:) See picture.
Too long, some might say. My thoughts do occasionally gravitate towards that idea, that we took too long, until I stop myself on realizing that everything happens for a reason.
"Diamonds" do not just happen. They occur only after extreme pressure applied over a period of time. If we want to speed up the process, and shorten the time period, we just step up the pressure. I've seen both - first, the protracted test that lasted more than 7 years, and then the higher-pressure approach involving ambitious goals and demanding timelines. Now, I'd not have been as open to the latter, and even enjoy the turbo-charged results-orientated process of the last 6 months, if I didn't first go through the "water torture" of the past.
This is an important moment for me and also for all the serious business builders in the Singapore/Malaysia market. As CEO Stewart Hughes puts it in his congratulatory email: "Please accept my heartiest congratulations for leading out and being the example all of Singapore and Malaysia needed to see: IT CAN BE DONE!"
In his email, Stewart also said: "By matching your ability and desire with the UniPower System and the Unicity products and plan you can achieve anything — more importantly you can help others achieve their most cherished dreams."
Very true. I've never felt more able to help others achieve their most cherished dreams than the past 5-6 months. It was during these recent months that I was blessed enough to become equipped with the ways and wisdom of the UniPower system, the brainchild of the Thai triple diamond Chavich Kim.
Certain people who had joined me before and dropped out too soon because they did not feel able to do what I did now rejoin me in the business and get going and start producing results within the first one or two months.
This breakthrough is possible only because of what has happened in the last 6 months, from March 2009 onwards. It is a prayer answered. So, i thank God for Godsents. For me, those Godsents have first been Unicity, 8 years ago, and recently, since March 2009, Khun Joe and the UniPower system.
Too long, some might say. My thoughts do occasionally gravitate towards that idea, that we took too long, until I stop myself on realizing that everything happens for a reason.
"Diamonds" do not just happen. They occur only after extreme pressure applied over a period of time. If we want to speed up the process, and shorten the time period, we just step up the pressure. I've seen both - first, the protracted test that lasted more than 7 years, and then the higher-pressure approach involving ambitious goals and demanding timelines. Now, I'd not have been as open to the latter, and even enjoy the turbo-charged results-orientated process of the last 6 months, if I didn't first go through the "water torture" of the past.
This is an important moment for me and also for all the serious business builders in the Singapore/Malaysia market. As CEO Stewart Hughes puts it in his congratulatory email: "Please accept my heartiest congratulations for leading out and being the example all of Singapore and Malaysia needed to see: IT CAN BE DONE!"
In his email, Stewart also said: "By matching your ability and desire with the UniPower System and the Unicity products and plan you can achieve anything — more importantly you can help others achieve their most cherished dreams."
Very true. I've never felt more able to help others achieve their most cherished dreams than the past 5-6 months. It was during these recent months that I was blessed enough to become equipped with the ways and wisdom of the UniPower system, the brainchild of the Thai triple diamond Chavich Kim.
Certain people who had joined me before and dropped out too soon because they did not feel able to do what I did now rejoin me in the business and get going and start producing results within the first one or two months.
This breakthrough is possible only because of what has happened in the last 6 months, from March 2009 onwards. It is a prayer answered. So, i thank God for Godsents. For me, those Godsents have first been Unicity, 8 years ago, and recently, since March 2009, Khun Joe and the UniPower system.
Sunday, June 28, 2009
Remembering the indomitable Tan Yoke Lane
Tan Yoke Lane @ Dan Yoke Lin (1939 - 1989) IS my late mom - a great woman, and mother of eight, who died too young, at the age of 50, long before she had the chance to enjoy the fully-grown fruits of her labour of love.
I remember getting a phone call from my elder brother in 1986, shortly before she was due to arrive in Singapore with my dad to witness my graduation from the National University of Singapore. Eng Hooi said, "Hai, bad news. Mom's got the Big C." It was nose or nasal cancer.
She battled the cancer for 3 years and in the end, despite chemotherapy at the Penang Medical Centre, succumbed. The cancer returned after a short remission, and quickly spread to her lungs.
I remember getting news of mom's death in September 1989. I was then a dealer-in-waiting at the stockbrokers JM Sassoon & Co. I was just starting out on a second career that turned out to be financially rewarding and that lasted 13 years. But mom didn't get to see or enjoy that success of mine, a success in which she had a big hand and which she'd have been proud of.
The best holiday I could afford to give her was a holiday in Bangkok, in July 1988, with dad, one of my sisters and my then girlfriend Chris. The only luxury I could afford then was a First Class train ticket, the one with sleeping berths, on the overnight train from our hometown Butterworth to Bangkok. I am glad we managed to do at least that.
Mom wanted to have grand children to hold, and said so, many times. The best I could do was to get married in January 1989, and shortly after, arranged for her to visit Chris and me and bless our new home, our own home, in Singapore. I wanted to bring her to places, but I remember, she was generally too weak to even catch glimpses of the sights I wanted to share with her, let alone enjoy the moment. But I am glad we tried, and have beautiful photos of those precious last days. Yes, that was the last time I saw her alive ...
Recently, as I reflected upon my recent triumphs and success as a business builder working in partnership with the wellness company, Unicity International, I couldn't help thinking about mom.
I remember when I first set out on my entrepreneurial journey in Unicity, I had resolved that when I am successful, I will either put up a building in her name or have a road named after her, and simply named Tan Yoke Lane. There shall be a plaque that tells the story of an indomitable spirit whom I believe will inspire many as it continues to inspire me, I thought.
Then, recently, I thought, why wait for that building or that road? I can very well dedicate my success todate and my success to come to her, and start telling people about her. And so I did - when I was given the opportunity to share my success story in Singapore and in Kuala Lumpur last week.
Mom's life spoke of a readiness to break out of the tried and tested and keep exploring and employing new ways of getting the better life.
I remember the love story of my mom and dad, how they met in my grandmother's coffeeshop in Kuala Lumpur. She was sewing when he walked up to chat her up. She poked him with a needle, and then regretted it when his finger bled. So, she nursed and bandaged the young man's finger. Love grew out of that encounter. Later, she'd eloped with dad to Penang because her parents did not approve of her getting married to a mere lorry driver.
For many years after that, mom would return to KL every year, bringing us, the kids, along, and doing everything to make sure that her parents knew that she had made the right decision and was living a better life. She would return to KL bearing gifts and food that testified to that.
Mom and dad were to raise a family with eight children, the first of whom died young at 7 and whom she would always want us to remember. The eldest of the 7 surviving siblings is today 50 and the youngest, 35. To do this well under the watchful eyes and critical tongues of many highly-opinionated in-laws, mom reinvented herself many times.
Mom went from being a laundry woman and seamstress to a baker, learning how to make the full range of local or Nyonya "kuihs" or cakes from my Peranakan sarong kebaya-clad grandma. Mom was good at them all - from the laborious ningao (sweet cake) to the angkukuih, kuih kapik (love letters), kuih talam ... You name it, she could do it, and did it famously well. We'd be inundated with orders every Chinese Year and on festive occasions. She also headed a tontine, or informal community lending and borrowing club, where people with excess money would lend to those with cashflow problems at interest rates of up to 20% or more. Our hometown would from time to time be abuzz with bad news of a tontine leader who ran off with people's money. But mom was a beacon of strength, integrity and trustworthiness. She never suffered a run even in the worst of times.
At the height of her constantly evolving and ever-changing economic career, mom was a chef par excellence. Her cooking was well known and in great demand. I remember how a customer bought her a return air ticket to get her to KL to cook for a wedding dinner. With just one big wok and a set of cooking utensils, mom set off for the airport and flew to KL to whip up an 8-course dinner for 300 people or 30 tables. She'd normally be assisted by no more than two assistant cooks and two dishwashers, the dishwashers being none other than the elder of my three then-still-young sisters.
After every such successful outing, we would witness the arrival of a new TV, or a new refrigerator or a new hi-fi system. Mom was the reason why we were able to move from the ancestral home (kong chu) in Butterworth to a government-built terrace house (a place we could call our own, and in which relatives have no say or claim) in Seberang Jaya in 1981. Mom was the reason why the family was able to upgrade from the bicycle as a means of transport to a car about the same time as the big move.
Where was my dad in all this? After his early days as a lorry driver, dad held a job at the local bus company, moving up from driver cum conductor on the Butterworth-Alor Star route to station master in Bukit Mertajam. He worked in the same company, as long as I was aware, until he retired. His highest salary was just over RM600. Even then when money was worth more, that sum could not provide for much.
Dad, now 78 and healthy, was into current affairs (I know for I'd listen to him talk expertly about the news or politics of the day) and was once an active trade unionist. But he was never ambitious, economically speaking. Nonetheless, dad was a good man who never did anything wrong, nothing that the family would be ashamed of, and he remains so. We love and respect him for that.
The picture I have is that dad would give no trouble, but apparently, he wasn't comfortable handling trouble either. Mom once told me, if there was any problem at home, financial or otherwise, she'd have to bear it alone. Dad would not be around to hear about it, and if he did, he wouldn't have the patience for the details.
So, there you are - a story of a Hainanese woman married into a "foreign" Hokkien-speaking territory, who'd have to single-handedly do, and bear, whatever it took to first, make sure her earlier decisions in life turned out right, and second, to get for herself and her family all the amenities and trappings of the good life.
It was mom who after a well-deserved holiday and tour of Singapore returned to tell me how beautiful and inspiring the Nanyang University campus was, and how I should study hard so that I'd get to a university like that one day. It was mom who many years later would put together all the financial resources necessary, including borrowing from close trusted friends, so that I could get higher education in Singapore. I did get to Nantah when it was just a hostel for NUS students and enjoyed the campus grounds mom had told me about.
Now, so much later in life, 20 years after her passing, I look back and have so much to be thankful for. Much of my being, my character, obviously draws upon my mom's inspired life - my tenacity and toughness in the face of challenges or obstacles; my preparedness to take charge or take the lead when situations demand it; my readiness to reinvent myself career-wise to ensure my family's economic well-being. While well-meaning people would ask, why did you give up your stockbroking career and go into something so different, I think nothing of it. I am adaptable, and can change according to circumstances, thanks to mom's example.
If I had to come up with one word to remember her by, the best word would be INDOMITABLE. That means: Unyielding, unswerving, unwavering, unconquerable, unflinching, unbeatable, irrepressible, unstoppable, invincible, resolute, determined, stubbornly persistent, steadfast, staunch, untiring, tireless, unflagging, undaunted, fearless, brave, courageous, plucky ... Yes, she was all that :)
It's a great pity mom is not alive today to listen to me talk proudly of her and boast about her life exploits in public. There is nothing I or anyone can do about that. She is gone. However, there is something I can do about the fact that she lived and loved - to tell her story so that others may be inspired by her as I have been and continue to be.
What's in this story for you?
1. Live life flexibly: Be prepared to get out of your comfort zone to go after what matters most to you; and when and where necessary, be ready to reinvent yourself so as to make life better for yourself and your family.
2. Don't take it all on alone if you can help it: While willing to change according to circumstances, do not run your life like a one-man or one-woman show, if you can help it. Given the choices of her times, my mom couldn't help being Superwoman. But today, with the opening up of the economy, and the abundance of opportunities with many people-friendly economic alternatives, we certainly can help it.
3. Watch the stress level in your life: The stress of raising a whole family all by yourself can kill. I often say: While conventional wisdom says "smoking causes cancer", dad was the one who smoked cigarettes (though no longer, for many years now) but it is my mom who died of cancer. The lesson in my mom's life story is that we ought to watch the stress level. More than anything else, I believe, it is stress - be it emotional, physical, mental or economic or all of that combined - that weakens the body and undermines our ability to ward off free radicals and harmful virus, germs or toxins.
4. Do not fight cancer with only conventional treatment: When my mom was in the midst of fighting cancer, a cousin sister once asked me, "Hai, so how? What else are you going to do about it?" I remember feeling guilty and helpless at the same time, wishing there was more I could do than just pooling our financial resources to finance the medical treatment.
I wish I was as well-informed then as I am today. Alas, we can't turn back the clock. What I can do is to make sure that my mom did not live, suffer and die in vain. What I will do now is to speak with a vengeance, telling people that we can prevent cancer, and in the unfortunate situation when it is past prevention, and someone is already afflicted, we can still give him or her real hope beyond the debilitating effects of conventional treatment.
To break the remission and relapse cycle, be open to using nutritonal supplements to boost the body's defences against free radicals and also to oxygenate and alkalinize the body. During my mom's fight, Unicity or its predecessor company, Enrich, hadn't even arrived in Malaysia. Unicity is here now, ready to serve with a wide array of health-boosting wellness products, proven capable of bringing cancer patients from hopelessness or near death to a new lease of life. I personally know of a few of these blessed people and have often used this to encourage others in the fight against cancer.
Go on. My mom didn't have the chance to live a long healthy life, free of the scourge and curse of cancer. You have. My mom didn't have the chance to make life better without having to do everything by herself and taking on all the stress of making ends meet by herself. You have.
Do something about it. I have, and I am.
All this I do and speak in the memory of my beloved mom.
Thank you Mom. I love you.
I remember getting a phone call from my elder brother in 1986, shortly before she was due to arrive in Singapore with my dad to witness my graduation from the National University of Singapore. Eng Hooi said, "Hai, bad news. Mom's got the Big C." It was nose or nasal cancer.
She battled the cancer for 3 years and in the end, despite chemotherapy at the Penang Medical Centre, succumbed. The cancer returned after a short remission, and quickly spread to her lungs.
I remember getting news of mom's death in September 1989. I was then a dealer-in-waiting at the stockbrokers JM Sassoon & Co. I was just starting out on a second career that turned out to be financially rewarding and that lasted 13 years. But mom didn't get to see or enjoy that success of mine, a success in which she had a big hand and which she'd have been proud of.
The best holiday I could afford to give her was a holiday in Bangkok, in July 1988, with dad, one of my sisters and my then girlfriend Chris. The only luxury I could afford then was a First Class train ticket, the one with sleeping berths, on the overnight train from our hometown Butterworth to Bangkok. I am glad we managed to do at least that.
Mom wanted to have grand children to hold, and said so, many times. The best I could do was to get married in January 1989, and shortly after, arranged for her to visit Chris and me and bless our new home, our own home, in Singapore. I wanted to bring her to places, but I remember, she was generally too weak to even catch glimpses of the sights I wanted to share with her, let alone enjoy the moment. But I am glad we tried, and have beautiful photos of those precious last days. Yes, that was the last time I saw her alive ...
Recently, as I reflected upon my recent triumphs and success as a business builder working in partnership with the wellness company, Unicity International, I couldn't help thinking about mom.
I remember when I first set out on my entrepreneurial journey in Unicity, I had resolved that when I am successful, I will either put up a building in her name or have a road named after her, and simply named Tan Yoke Lane. There shall be a plaque that tells the story of an indomitable spirit whom I believe will inspire many as it continues to inspire me, I thought.
Then, recently, I thought, why wait for that building or that road? I can very well dedicate my success todate and my success to come to her, and start telling people about her. And so I did - when I was given the opportunity to share my success story in Singapore and in Kuala Lumpur last week.
Mom's life spoke of a readiness to break out of the tried and tested and keep exploring and employing new ways of getting the better life.
I remember the love story of my mom and dad, how they met in my grandmother's coffeeshop in Kuala Lumpur. She was sewing when he walked up to chat her up. She poked him with a needle, and then regretted it when his finger bled. So, she nursed and bandaged the young man's finger. Love grew out of that encounter. Later, she'd eloped with dad to Penang because her parents did not approve of her getting married to a mere lorry driver.
For many years after that, mom would return to KL every year, bringing us, the kids, along, and doing everything to make sure that her parents knew that she had made the right decision and was living a better life. She would return to KL bearing gifts and food that testified to that.
Mom and dad were to raise a family with eight children, the first of whom died young at 7 and whom she would always want us to remember. The eldest of the 7 surviving siblings is today 50 and the youngest, 35. To do this well under the watchful eyes and critical tongues of many highly-opinionated in-laws, mom reinvented herself many times.
Mom went from being a laundry woman and seamstress to a baker, learning how to make the full range of local or Nyonya "kuihs" or cakes from my Peranakan sarong kebaya-clad grandma. Mom was good at them all - from the laborious ningao (sweet cake) to the angkukuih, kuih kapik (love letters), kuih talam ... You name it, she could do it, and did it famously well. We'd be inundated with orders every Chinese Year and on festive occasions. She also headed a tontine, or informal community lending and borrowing club, where people with excess money would lend to those with cashflow problems at interest rates of up to 20% or more. Our hometown would from time to time be abuzz with bad news of a tontine leader who ran off with people's money. But mom was a beacon of strength, integrity and trustworthiness. She never suffered a run even in the worst of times.
At the height of her constantly evolving and ever-changing economic career, mom was a chef par excellence. Her cooking was well known and in great demand. I remember how a customer bought her a return air ticket to get her to KL to cook for a wedding dinner. With just one big wok and a set of cooking utensils, mom set off for the airport and flew to KL to whip up an 8-course dinner for 300 people or 30 tables. She'd normally be assisted by no more than two assistant cooks and two dishwashers, the dishwashers being none other than the elder of my three then-still-young sisters.
After every such successful outing, we would witness the arrival of a new TV, or a new refrigerator or a new hi-fi system. Mom was the reason why we were able to move from the ancestral home (kong chu) in Butterworth to a government-built terrace house (a place we could call our own, and in which relatives have no say or claim) in Seberang Jaya in 1981. Mom was the reason why the family was able to upgrade from the bicycle as a means of transport to a car about the same time as the big move.
Where was my dad in all this? After his early days as a lorry driver, dad held a job at the local bus company, moving up from driver cum conductor on the Butterworth-Alor Star route to station master in Bukit Mertajam. He worked in the same company, as long as I was aware, until he retired. His highest salary was just over RM600. Even then when money was worth more, that sum could not provide for much.
Dad, now 78 and healthy, was into current affairs (I know for I'd listen to him talk expertly about the news or politics of the day) and was once an active trade unionist. But he was never ambitious, economically speaking. Nonetheless, dad was a good man who never did anything wrong, nothing that the family would be ashamed of, and he remains so. We love and respect him for that.
The picture I have is that dad would give no trouble, but apparently, he wasn't comfortable handling trouble either. Mom once told me, if there was any problem at home, financial or otherwise, she'd have to bear it alone. Dad would not be around to hear about it, and if he did, he wouldn't have the patience for the details.
So, there you are - a story of a Hainanese woman married into a "foreign" Hokkien-speaking territory, who'd have to single-handedly do, and bear, whatever it took to first, make sure her earlier decisions in life turned out right, and second, to get for herself and her family all the amenities and trappings of the good life.
It was mom who after a well-deserved holiday and tour of Singapore returned to tell me how beautiful and inspiring the Nanyang University campus was, and how I should study hard so that I'd get to a university like that one day. It was mom who many years later would put together all the financial resources necessary, including borrowing from close trusted friends, so that I could get higher education in Singapore. I did get to Nantah when it was just a hostel for NUS students and enjoyed the campus grounds mom had told me about.
Now, so much later in life, 20 years after her passing, I look back and have so much to be thankful for. Much of my being, my character, obviously draws upon my mom's inspired life - my tenacity and toughness in the face of challenges or obstacles; my preparedness to take charge or take the lead when situations demand it; my readiness to reinvent myself career-wise to ensure my family's economic well-being. While well-meaning people would ask, why did you give up your stockbroking career and go into something so different, I think nothing of it. I am adaptable, and can change according to circumstances, thanks to mom's example.
If I had to come up with one word to remember her by, the best word would be INDOMITABLE. That means: Unyielding, unswerving, unwavering, unconquerable, unflinching, unbeatable, irrepressible, unstoppable, invincible, resolute, determined, stubbornly persistent, steadfast, staunch, untiring, tireless, unflagging, undaunted, fearless, brave, courageous, plucky ... Yes, she was all that :)
It's a great pity mom is not alive today to listen to me talk proudly of her and boast about her life exploits in public. There is nothing I or anyone can do about that. She is gone. However, there is something I can do about the fact that she lived and loved - to tell her story so that others may be inspired by her as I have been and continue to be.
What's in this story for you?
1. Live life flexibly: Be prepared to get out of your comfort zone to go after what matters most to you; and when and where necessary, be ready to reinvent yourself so as to make life better for yourself and your family.
2. Don't take it all on alone if you can help it: While willing to change according to circumstances, do not run your life like a one-man or one-woman show, if you can help it. Given the choices of her times, my mom couldn't help being Superwoman. But today, with the opening up of the economy, and the abundance of opportunities with many people-friendly economic alternatives, we certainly can help it.
3. Watch the stress level in your life: The stress of raising a whole family all by yourself can kill. I often say: While conventional wisdom says "smoking causes cancer", dad was the one who smoked cigarettes (though no longer, for many years now) but it is my mom who died of cancer. The lesson in my mom's life story is that we ought to watch the stress level. More than anything else, I believe, it is stress - be it emotional, physical, mental or economic or all of that combined - that weakens the body and undermines our ability to ward off free radicals and harmful virus, germs or toxins.
4. Do not fight cancer with only conventional treatment: When my mom was in the midst of fighting cancer, a cousin sister once asked me, "Hai, so how? What else are you going to do about it?" I remember feeling guilty and helpless at the same time, wishing there was more I could do than just pooling our financial resources to finance the medical treatment.
I wish I was as well-informed then as I am today. Alas, we can't turn back the clock. What I can do is to make sure that my mom did not live, suffer and die in vain. What I will do now is to speak with a vengeance, telling people that we can prevent cancer, and in the unfortunate situation when it is past prevention, and someone is already afflicted, we can still give him or her real hope beyond the debilitating effects of conventional treatment.
To break the remission and relapse cycle, be open to using nutritonal supplements to boost the body's defences against free radicals and also to oxygenate and alkalinize the body. During my mom's fight, Unicity or its predecessor company, Enrich, hadn't even arrived in Malaysia. Unicity is here now, ready to serve with a wide array of health-boosting wellness products, proven capable of bringing cancer patients from hopelessness or near death to a new lease of life. I personally know of a few of these blessed people and have often used this to encourage others in the fight against cancer.
Go on. My mom didn't have the chance to live a long healthy life, free of the scourge and curse of cancer. You have. My mom didn't have the chance to make life better without having to do everything by herself and taking on all the stress of making ends meet by herself. You have.
Do something about it. I have, and I am.
All this I do and speak in the memory of my beloved mom.
Thank you Mom. I love you.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Lord, thanks for the powerful winds of change!
Happily, I'd like to continue the blogpost of March 13.
I am glad I learnt from God's Eagle - not to be afraid of adversity or challenges, nor to flee from them, but instead, to position myself to take them on, and harness the power of the winds of change to soar higher than ever before.
The challengers turn out to be friends sent by God(see the picture), with signs to make sure we do not doubt that, and the enemies and detractors were forced by divine circumstances to be come friends and willing co-workers, lending their numbers and energies to lift us all higher.
WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!! God is truly GREAT!!
Friends, I've never enjoyed as much effortless success as I have since March 19th - the day things all turned around in my favour, from what seemed like a low point to a series of high points in our business development efforts. This is only the beginning of a new beginning ......
Friday, March 13, 2009
Eagles welcome storms, soar over them
Thank God for creating a magnificent creature like the eagle from which we can draw so many powerful life lessons. One of these has just become especially meaningful to me, empowering me to face off one of the biggest challenges ever in my professional life. You have those challenges yourself, don't you? If so, consider this:
The eagle is not afraid of storms. It expects them.
The eagle can sense a storm coming well in advance.
It does not flee from the bad winds coming towards it. Instead, it positions itself, either on a mountain perch or in mid-air, waiting fearlessly for them.
As the winds blow in, the eagle spreads its wings, in all their magnificant glory, and let the winds blow against its wings.
In so doing, it harnesses the power of the storm to lift itself higher, soaring over the gale.
What a beautiful picture of how we can thrive in adversity and overcome our enemies or detractors, rising above them.
So, fear not. Fly high no matter what obstacles and challenges come our way.
Let challenges strengthen our resolve, sharpen our fighting edge.
Thank God for the Eagles indeed!
Monday, February 09, 2009
The Art of Socializing 101
At last night’s Monday Night Seminar, a Skills Workshop led by Unicity Director Kelly Lim, we covered the topic “Prospecting: Socializing, Asking Questions & Listening, Getting the Sale”.
Kelly started by inviting participants to rate themselves on a scale of 1 to 10 how good we think we are in socializing. A handout was provided for that. After that, for those of us who rated ourselves less than 10, be it 4, 5 or 8, we were asked to list down in the space provided what we think we need to know or get good at to become a 10.
Going around the room, we obtained the following responses.
How do I create these social settings/events? How do I break the ice? How do I be comfortable at social events like a cocktail? How do I socialize with quiet, boring people? How do I draw people to me? How do I approach people without looking like you have a hidden agenda? How to break into a group that is already engaged in a conversation?
We didn’t get around to all the questions, but we got to most of them, directly or indirectly. Please find below the Q&A, based on last night's workshop, with my own additional contributions to the topic.
++++++++++++++++
Q1: How do I create these social settings/events?
A: Why create your own when you can leverage on events organized by others? Start by riding on events created by others, and readily accepting invitations to socials.
Q2: How do I break the ice?
A: Look around the room. If someone smiles at you - and there is bound to be such people, smile back, walk up to extend a hand, and say Hi. Introduce yourself by name, ask the other party for his or her name, and then move quickly to ask, "What do you do?". Then, stay on the subject - the other person and what he does, and go with the flow. Be ready to offer, in exchange and to ensure a two-way conversation, information on yourself. You are likely to be exchanging name cards very quickly. When doing so, resist the desire to make any pitch. That can come later, after the function. Focus on the other party, and what his/her name card says he/she does.
Q3: I find myself feeling comfortable at certain social events like a cocktail? How do I be comfortable?
A: It is important that we first be comfortable with ourselves – who we are, what we do, what we represent. Worry not about what people might think of us, or how smart (or dumb) we may sound with what we say. Be yourself i.e. be self-assured; not self-conscious. Focus on getting to know people, forget about thinking about what others may think of us. Let the conversations (and unspoken thoughts) not be about us; let it be about "them".
Q4: How do I socialize with quiet, boring people?
A: First, get this straight: Nobody, NOBODY, is ever boring - even less so, those who, like you, make it to a social function. Instead of focusing on yourself, being self-conscious, concentrate on looking out for someone who may be standing in a corner - alone, maybe feeling awkward. Befriend him/her. Say hello, introduce yourself and ask for his/her name in the same breath, then find out what he/she does for a living. From there, again, go with the flow. Who knows, he or she may be so grateful you made the move and help him/her be comfortable.
Q5: How do I draw people to me?
A: Be comfortable, relaxed and friendly; and be ready to be engaged in a conversation, focused on others. Self-assured people attract others; socially-awkward people turn others off.
Q6: How to approach people without looking like you have a hidden agenda?
A: Kelly had a good advice on this. The best way to never be perceived to have a hidden agenda is to not to hide your agenda in the first place!!! Be open about what you are and what you represent; be ready to give out your business cards. Just be careful not to focus on telling people about your card, but on getting them to talk about theirs.
Q7: How to break into a group that is already engaged in a conversation?
A: Do what confident, self-assured people do. Walk right up to the crowd, and say, "Hi, may I please join in?" Then, focus not on drawing attention to yourself or your opinion, but on listening in closely to others. If you must speak, ask "please tell me more"questions.
++++++++++++
As I followed the workshop discussion, last night, I was struck by how the questions and concerns revolved very much around the "Doing" - the “what to do”, and the “how to do”. I thought, How true it is that our Doing will be fine if we first get our "Being" right.
Think about this (and I am borrowing from and paraphrasing my Pastor): The right being will lead to the right doing. (My Pastor says, “The right believing begets the right living.”)
People who feel uncomfortable in social settings or who are socially awkward tend to be self-pre-occupied, overly concerned with what people think of them, what they do and what they represent. They are concerned about whether they are doing or saying the right things, thinking others are standing around and watching, ever ready to pass judgement. That is being self-preoccupied, self-conscious, self-focused.
In a few after-meeting conversations, I floated the idea of our only having to be self-assured, and to be so before we enter into a social setting.
For example, let's be sure that we are comfortable with
1) what we are (e.g. business people building up a personal franchise);
2) what we do (e.g. we sell products or opportunity; we serve customers; we recruit people to do the same and train and support them);
3) what we represent (the Bios Life Slim opportunity, and the best of MLM).
As we enter into a social setting, and engage people in conversations, we should be self-assured enough to let people know who we are by passing out our name cards and very briefly introducing ourselves (don't be shy about that), and then, move on to focus on others - getting hold of their name cards, studying those name cards as we hold them in our hands, asking questions to get to know them and find out about what they do.
Try these ideas the next time you venture into a social function. Keep the focus on others, not yourself, and let's see what happens.
Kelly started by inviting participants to rate themselves on a scale of 1 to 10 how good we think we are in socializing. A handout was provided for that. After that, for those of us who rated ourselves less than 10, be it 4, 5 or 8, we were asked to list down in the space provided what we think we need to know or get good at to become a 10.
Going around the room, we obtained the following responses.
How do I create these social settings/events? How do I break the ice? How do I be comfortable at social events like a cocktail? How do I socialize with quiet, boring people? How do I draw people to me? How do I approach people without looking like you have a hidden agenda? How to break into a group that is already engaged in a conversation?
We didn’t get around to all the questions, but we got to most of them, directly or indirectly. Please find below the Q&A, based on last night's workshop, with my own additional contributions to the topic.
++++++++++++++++
Q1: How do I create these social settings/events?
A: Why create your own when you can leverage on events organized by others? Start by riding on events created by others, and readily accepting invitations to socials.
Q2: How do I break the ice?
A: Look around the room. If someone smiles at you - and there is bound to be such people, smile back, walk up to extend a hand, and say Hi. Introduce yourself by name, ask the other party for his or her name, and then move quickly to ask, "What do you do?". Then, stay on the subject - the other person and what he does, and go with the flow. Be ready to offer, in exchange and to ensure a two-way conversation, information on yourself. You are likely to be exchanging name cards very quickly. When doing so, resist the desire to make any pitch. That can come later, after the function. Focus on the other party, and what his/her name card says he/she does.
Q3: I find myself feeling comfortable at certain social events like a cocktail? How do I be comfortable?
A: It is important that we first be comfortable with ourselves – who we are, what we do, what we represent. Worry not about what people might think of us, or how smart (or dumb) we may sound with what we say. Be yourself i.e. be self-assured; not self-conscious. Focus on getting to know people, forget about thinking about what others may think of us. Let the conversations (and unspoken thoughts) not be about us; let it be about "them".
Q4: How do I socialize with quiet, boring people?
A: First, get this straight: Nobody, NOBODY, is ever boring - even less so, those who, like you, make it to a social function. Instead of focusing on yourself, being self-conscious, concentrate on looking out for someone who may be standing in a corner - alone, maybe feeling awkward. Befriend him/her. Say hello, introduce yourself and ask for his/her name in the same breath, then find out what he/she does for a living. From there, again, go with the flow. Who knows, he or she may be so grateful you made the move and help him/her be comfortable.
Q5: How do I draw people to me?
A: Be comfortable, relaxed and friendly; and be ready to be engaged in a conversation, focused on others. Self-assured people attract others; socially-awkward people turn others off.
Q6: How to approach people without looking like you have a hidden agenda?
A: Kelly had a good advice on this. The best way to never be perceived to have a hidden agenda is to not to hide your agenda in the first place!!! Be open about what you are and what you represent; be ready to give out your business cards. Just be careful not to focus on telling people about your card, but on getting them to talk about theirs.
Q7: How to break into a group that is already engaged in a conversation?
A: Do what confident, self-assured people do. Walk right up to the crowd, and say, "Hi, may I please join in?" Then, focus not on drawing attention to yourself or your opinion, but on listening in closely to others. If you must speak, ask "please tell me more"questions.
++++++++++++
As I followed the workshop discussion, last night, I was struck by how the questions and concerns revolved very much around the "Doing" - the “what to do”, and the “how to do”. I thought, How true it is that our Doing will be fine if we first get our "Being" right.
Think about this (and I am borrowing from and paraphrasing my Pastor): The right being will lead to the right doing. (My Pastor says, “The right believing begets the right living.”)
People who feel uncomfortable in social settings or who are socially awkward tend to be self-pre-occupied, overly concerned with what people think of them, what they do and what they represent. They are concerned about whether they are doing or saying the right things, thinking others are standing around and watching, ever ready to pass judgement. That is being self-preoccupied, self-conscious, self-focused.
In a few after-meeting conversations, I floated the idea of our only having to be self-assured, and to be so before we enter into a social setting.
For example, let's be sure that we are comfortable with
1) what we are (e.g. business people building up a personal franchise);
2) what we do (e.g. we sell products or opportunity; we serve customers; we recruit people to do the same and train and support them);
3) what we represent (the Bios Life Slim opportunity, and the best of MLM).
As we enter into a social setting, and engage people in conversations, we should be self-assured enough to let people know who we are by passing out our name cards and very briefly introducing ourselves (don't be shy about that), and then, move on to focus on others - getting hold of their name cards, studying those name cards as we hold them in our hands, asking questions to get to know them and find out about what they do.
Try these ideas the next time you venture into a social function. Keep the focus on others, not yourself, and let's see what happens.
Thursday, December 25, 2008
The Reason for the Season
Hi Readers,
In my business, we teach and prepare people for the 90:10 rule. (Some say 80:20; but from my observations, it looks more like 90:10 most of the time :))
For 90% of people, "Seeing is Believing". In other words, for most people, they think that only when they can see (e.g. that our business model works), will they believe that it does.
For the other 10% of people, the reverse is true: Believing is Seeing. Because they first believe, they can picture vividly the possibilities in the future as if it was already real and present.
I was reflecting on these thoughts, among others, as I thought about what I'd like to share with my highly-valued and greatly-treasured friends and associates in a Christmas email. Surely, Christmas could not come and go without comment from comment-happy me :)
Here, I am sharing with you a lightly-edited version of my Christmas eve email to my friends, partners and colleagues.
I thought about the "Seeing Is Believing" bit as I marvelled at how people all over the world, Christians and non-Christians, celebrate Christmas, acknowledging knowingly or unknowingly the historical event that occurred over 2,000 years ago - the birth of baby Jesus.
I remembered sharing with someone who was in trouble with himself and making a mess of his life only a few weeks ago, that Christ was the only baby ever born to die.
He would die young so that we may live long and abundantly. He would die poor and wretched so that we may live rich and well. He would die taking on all our infirmities and sicknesses on his body so that we may live in health. He would die cursed so that we may live blessed. He would die, a Star hanging from a Tree (see picture), bearing all of our sins and wrongs so that we may walk in His righteousness and appear spotless in God's eyes.
Then, I thought to myself: Hey, Jesus was God personified - in speech, in action, in demeanour and in style. Everywhere Jesus went, as recorded in the Bible with many supporting cross-references, he performed great miracles e.g. bringing people back from the dead, healing the sick, helping the blind to see again, calming storms with just one utterance, walking on water.
For those people who believe in the axiom, "Seeing Is Believing", consider this: Did everyone who see Jesus do what he did and hear Jesus said what he said believe what they saw and heard? Some did; many didn't.
Now, do I have to see God personified to believe that He exists? Nope, not for me, not anymore. I'm happy to say that I regard myself to be among the 10 in the 90:10.
I believe; therefore I see. And for that, have I been blessed mightily.
I am thankful to God for watching over me, my family and my finances all of this year. With divine timing and interventions, we have been able to navigate the ups and downs of the economy and the markets exceedingly well.
I am thankful to God for answering all of our little prayers, reaffirming us in our faith that nothing is ever too trivial for God nor is anything too big. Whatever concerns his children, matters to Him.
I am thankful to God for empowering us with a stress-free, rest-ful life. Whatever happens to the economy, or the marketplace, we have no need to be anxious or worried. What we can do, we do; what we can't, we just leave it to God. Our being anxious doesn't contribute to the solution, and for those of us in the health & nutrition business, we know very well that anxiety or stress is bad for health.
I realized that it's because of Jesus that I can talk to God, talk about God and have a relationship with God.
I do feel greatly blessed, highly favoured and deeply loved, every day.
Now, you know my "secret" - the source of my unshakeable calm and enduring optimism :))
This Christmas, please allow me to be completely open with you and share with you what gives me both Rest and Power to do what I want to do. It's Jesus, whose birth we all celebrate with Christmas.
You must have heard or read these verses before, but if there is ever a good time to read them again, it is now:
"For God so loved the world that He gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved." - John 3:16-17
So, my dear readers, I wish you a Wonderfully Blessed Christmas. May the true meaning of Christmas touch you and bless you in the days and the years ahead.
God Bless You,
Eng Hai.
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Stroke patient Alvin stages remarkable recovery
Alvin Chan, a 31-year-old stroke patient, shows how he is now able to lift his left hand without the struggle, the pain and the contortions of the recent past. It's been just over two weeks since he was introduced to the rejuvenating powers of Unicity's anti-aging drink Enjuvenate.
Within these few weeks, his mobility has improved so much that the nurses at his stroke rehabilitation centre are sitting up and monitoring his progress closely, inquiring about the reason behind his accelerated recovery.
Alvin Chan suffered a stroke in Jan 2008. The blood vessels in his brain burst in three different places. Surgery helped, and another surgery is due soon - to patch back a hole in his skull.
By Alvin's own admission, the stroke was the result of neglect of underlying conditions such as high cholesterol and high blood pressure. He has a sordid family history punctured by similar episodes. His mother died of stroke while his father was disabled by the same disease and is now being cared for in a nursing home.
"I used to think stroke or heart attack happen only to old people. Now, I know better."
He is being proactive now to make sure it doesn't happen again. He wasted little time putting himself on Enjuvenate after being introduced to it by Ms Yap Wee Cheng (seated next to him) who had been volunteering at his rehab centre and giving him free Yoga Therapy. He is also using Bios Life with a view to weaning his body off the dependence on three different medications for high cholesterol and high blood pressure.
Alvin is not only enjoying the first fruits of the better health that Unicity's products offer. He has also seized upon the economic lifeline that comes with membership in Unicity.
He used to be a Yong Tau Fu hawker before stroke felled him. Unable to continue with his business or to get a job, he has been living on public assistance and running down his limited personal savings. Then, one day, in a private conversation, he told Wee Cheng he was looking for a way to make money.
He didn't have enough money to open a S$1,000 Bios Life Franchise account. But he trusted and believed us enough to cough up the cash to buy Enjuvenate for immediate use. He also listened well and took action quickly.
In the two weeks that his body has been healing fast, Alvin wasted no time to share the products with his friends - in the home and outside. By Oct 14, he has generated enough sales of Enjuvenate, Bios Life Slim and other products (like SGGC) to upgrade his Unicity account into that of a Bios Life Franchise.
In the short time that he has been with us, Alvin has been a great inspiration.
His experience has also strongly validated a few of the central themes of our business:
1. Our products work. They do for people what we said they'd do.
2. Having no money is not a good reason to not get started. Those who do not have the S$1,000 to buy the products first can always sell S$1,000 of products before signing up for a franchise.
3. Using the products out of understanding and belief in what "trusted others" say, and then believing the products even more out of first-hand personal experience, is a necessary and powerful first step in our business of word-of-mouth marketing.
Alvin, Congratulations! And Thank You!
The future is now bright and exciting!
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Gems from Busan: Great counsel from great leaders
Thank you Todd Smith (USA, Presidential Diamond), Rick Jordan (USA, Diamond), Alexander Krause (Germany, Double Diamond), Daniel Mueller (Germany, Double Diamond), Sven Goebel (Germany, Double Diamond), Aaron Webber (USA, Diamond), Joe Chavich Kim (Thailand, Diamond) and Rasa Comeban (Thailand, Diamond) for your great consel on what it takes to succeed fabulously in the Unicity business.
What a blast!
Consider these gems which I picked out from this Panel Discussion at the 2008 Unicity Global Convention in Busan, 18-20 September 2008:
Strive to excel whatever you do: "The No 1 key to success is to strive for excellence at the key fundamentals of the business. The people at the top simply bring more value to the company and the market than others at lower ends of the payscale. Excel at whatever you do. Every day, get better at all that you’re doing – calls, presentations, asking for a decision, getting people started. Every day, strive for constant and never ending improvement." - Todd Smith.
Know what you do not want: "Most people do not know what they really want. They say it but they do not feel it. So I specialize in helping people figure out what they really do not want. Your “do not want” gives you clues on what you want - very personal goals with energy. We can make something good out of a bad thing. - Alexander Krause. (He asked everyone to take a minute to write what we do not want. What's your "Do Not Want"?)
Take ownership: "This is a great business, an outstanding business. It’s your business. You’re not working someone else’s business. It’s yours. You own it. You control it. If you don’t take the business and own it, you will fail. Make no excuses. It’s not the product nor the compensation plan .. it’s you. Own your business!" - Aaron Webber.
How do they keep themselves motivated:
"A goal not written is only a wish. Carry it in your pocket, close to your heart." - Rick Jordan, who has this written down, "Build 5 legs with 3 Diamonds each. Help 15 other people to become Diamonds"
"Seeing my people succeed" - Rasa Comeban.
"Do what others say are impossible ... Making a difference for others." - Chavich Kim
"Wherever there is a room with no light, light up the candle." - Alexander Krause.
"Doing my part to make us the leading light of the industry. What was, is not going to be. Today’s leaders is not tomorrow’s. We are the most qualified to take industry leadership." - Aaron Webber.
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Full Heart, Strong Heart, Big Heart
In the concluding session of a series of training workshops on Business-Building Basics, we zoomed in on a key factor that I believe accounts for a lack of results from some people despite their showing up regularly for training. The Heart!
We started the session by inviting all present to come up with one advice each, that they know of, or grew up with, or have been told of in recent memory, that involves the word, "heart". Surprisingly, many had difficulty coming up with something. Hmm.... people have not been thinking about the heart?
In the end, after some difficulty, we did come up with a number of hearty advice e.g. In all that you do, do it with all your heart. Have a heart for others .... And here's a cute one: When the husband forgets the wife's birthday, or fails to bring home her favorite food despite repeated hints, she'd simply say, "No Heart!" ;)
I recalled learning from the most successful of Unicity's Thai leaders, Khun Chavich Kim a.k.a. Joe, a phrase I initially thought sounded odd but later decided makes a lot of sense. "Full Heart." The context? "No time? Never mind. I don't need you to do the business full-time. I just need you to do it full heart."
Against these illustrations, I suggested that people who do not have much results to show despite showing up for training for month after month, even year after year, may need to search their hearts.
Is the lack of results because they did not take to heart whatever they learn? Or could it be that they didn't go all out, whole-heartedly, to do whatever it takes to produce the results they think they want? Or is it that they simply do not know what they really want with all their heart?
As the discussion progressed, we figured out that we need to be not just whole-hearted but also strong-hearted. Sometimes, people do not do what they ought to because they are afraid of the rejections, the naysayers, dream-stealers and other types of negative people.
Post-session, I continued to engage my partners and associates on the heart theme. We discovered an important third component - Big Heart! We need a Big Heart so that there'd be ample space in our hearts for the interests and concerns of others. The small-hearted people has only just enough space for themselves and their feelings. We need a Big Heart so that we can be quick to forgive those whom we feel have wronged us, and slow to judge or to condemn. That way, we get to stay in control of our emotions and be well placed to win the "inner game" of life and business.
So, there you are: FULL HEART, STRONG HEART, BIG HEART - all that we need to do well in whatever we choose to do.
I sieved through my archive of quotable quotes, "Insights Of The Day" from self-improvement guru Bob Proctor, and picked out a selection to help me illustrate this, what we might call, hearty formula for success :)
About a FULL HEART
"If you make the unconditional commitment to reach your most important goals, if the strength of your decision is sufficient, you will find the way and the power to achieve your goals." - Robert Conklin, Teacher, Author and Speaker
"The important thing is not being afraid to take a chance. Remember, the greatest failure is to not try. Once you find something you love to do, be the best at doing it." - Debbi Fields, Founder of Mrs. Fields Cookies
"Bigness comes from doing many small things well. Individually, they are not very dramatic transactions. Together though, they add up." - Edward S. Finkelstein, Author
"Four short words sum up what has lifted most successful individuals above the crowd: a little bit more. They did all that was expected of them and a little bit more." - A. Lou Vickery, Writer
About a STRONG HEART
"My father used to say to me, 'Whenever you get into a jam, whenever you get into a crisis or an emergency...become the calmest person in the room and you'll be able to figure your way out of it.’ - Rudolph Giuliani, Former Mayor of New York City
"There is absolutely nothing that separates the elite from the paupers except their expectations. If you wish to rise above the masses, then let the fire burn fiercely within you. Do this, and it shall be done!." - J. Arthur Holcombe, Author of The Path of Truth and Courage
“Failure will never overtake me if my determination to succeed is strong enough." – Og Mandino, 1923-1996, Author and Speaker
"People of mediocre ability sometimes achieve outstanding success because they don't know when to quit. Most people succeed because they are determined to." - George E. Allen, 1832-1907, Publisher and Author
About a BIG HEART
The unthankful heart discovers no mercies; but let the thankful heart sweep through the day and, as the magnet finds the iron, so it will find, in every hour, some heavenly blessings!" - Henry Ward Beecher, 1813-1887, Author
"Select a few people to be particularly kind to today - those you were a little harsh with yesterday." – Normal Vincent Peale, 1898-1993, Author and Speaker
We started the session by inviting all present to come up with one advice each, that they know of, or grew up with, or have been told of in recent memory, that involves the word, "heart". Surprisingly, many had difficulty coming up with something. Hmm.... people have not been thinking about the heart?
In the end, after some difficulty, we did come up with a number of hearty advice e.g. In all that you do, do it with all your heart. Have a heart for others .... And here's a cute one: When the husband forgets the wife's birthday, or fails to bring home her favorite food despite repeated hints, she'd simply say, "No Heart!" ;)
I recalled learning from the most successful of Unicity's Thai leaders, Khun Chavich Kim a.k.a. Joe, a phrase I initially thought sounded odd but later decided makes a lot of sense. "Full Heart." The context? "No time? Never mind. I don't need you to do the business full-time. I just need you to do it full heart."
Against these illustrations, I suggested that people who do not have much results to show despite showing up for training for month after month, even year after year, may need to search their hearts.
Is the lack of results because they did not take to heart whatever they learn? Or could it be that they didn't go all out, whole-heartedly, to do whatever it takes to produce the results they think they want? Or is it that they simply do not know what they really want with all their heart?
As the discussion progressed, we figured out that we need to be not just whole-hearted but also strong-hearted. Sometimes, people do not do what they ought to because they are afraid of the rejections, the naysayers, dream-stealers and other types of negative people.
Post-session, I continued to engage my partners and associates on the heart theme. We discovered an important third component - Big Heart! We need a Big Heart so that there'd be ample space in our hearts for the interests and concerns of others. The small-hearted people has only just enough space for themselves and their feelings. We need a Big Heart so that we can be quick to forgive those whom we feel have wronged us, and slow to judge or to condemn. That way, we get to stay in control of our emotions and be well placed to win the "inner game" of life and business.
So, there you are: FULL HEART, STRONG HEART, BIG HEART - all that we need to do well in whatever we choose to do.
I sieved through my archive of quotable quotes, "Insights Of The Day" from self-improvement guru Bob Proctor, and picked out a selection to help me illustrate this, what we might call, hearty formula for success :)
About a FULL HEART
"If you make the unconditional commitment to reach your most important goals, if the strength of your decision is sufficient, you will find the way and the power to achieve your goals." - Robert Conklin, Teacher, Author and Speaker
"The important thing is not being afraid to take a chance. Remember, the greatest failure is to not try. Once you find something you love to do, be the best at doing it." - Debbi Fields, Founder of Mrs. Fields Cookies
"Bigness comes from doing many small things well. Individually, they are not very dramatic transactions. Together though, they add up." - Edward S. Finkelstein, Author
"Four short words sum up what has lifted most successful individuals above the crowd: a little bit more. They did all that was expected of them and a little bit more." - A. Lou Vickery, Writer
About a STRONG HEART
"My father used to say to me, 'Whenever you get into a jam, whenever you get into a crisis or an emergency...become the calmest person in the room and you'll be able to figure your way out of it.’ - Rudolph Giuliani, Former Mayor of New York City
"There is absolutely nothing that separates the elite from the paupers except their expectations. If you wish to rise above the masses, then let the fire burn fiercely within you. Do this, and it shall be done!." - J. Arthur Holcombe, Author of The Path of Truth and Courage
“Failure will never overtake me if my determination to succeed is strong enough." – Og Mandino, 1923-1996, Author and Speaker
"People of mediocre ability sometimes achieve outstanding success because they don't know when to quit. Most people succeed because they are determined to." - George E. Allen, 1832-1907, Publisher and Author
About a BIG HEART
The unthankful heart discovers no mercies; but let the thankful heart sweep through the day and, as the magnet finds the iron, so it will find, in every hour, some heavenly blessings!" - Henry Ward Beecher, 1813-1887, Author
"Select a few people to be particularly kind to today - those you were a little harsh with yesterday." – Normal Vincent Peale, 1898-1993, Author and Speaker
Thursday, June 19, 2008
Selling can lose you friends???
At our "Keys to Success, Wealth & More Friends" seminar on June 15, workshop leader Kelly Lim guided the attendees to focus on two questions - basically, two sides of the same issue.
Q1. Why do people think and say selling can cause you to lose friends?
Q2. How would (or should) you do it such that you won't lose friends and instead make friends?
Going around the room, we got the following responses to Q1:
#1: I do seem to scare away my friends and I don't even know why ... some people tell me I ask too many questions.
#2: Hard selling, or forcing a sale of a product on friends, is what will lose you friends. Worse, if you are selling what you don't even believe in!
#3: You will lose friends if you are persistent in the wrong way - keep asking people to buy products from you even when they have said "no".
In the discussion that followed, a leader who was concerned that Q1 was even discussed at all, said: If you keep losing friends in the course of prospecting, examine your ways of selling. But do not be too hard on yourself. Sometimes, it is not your selling that is at fault. It is that the prospect is not good enough. There is such a thing as a "Prospect from Hell". We have come across one or two over the years ;)
As the discussion went around the room, with contributions from people of various levels of experience, we quickly established the following consensus response to Q2:
1. When going into a conversation with any prospect, it is important that we go in with the objective of wanting to get to know the person better, not going for a sale. In getting to know a person, we're really looking out or listening up for a fit - a good fit between the prospect's needs and what we can offer. Where a fit cannot be found, we must simply let go.
2. Think Relationship Marketing, another name for Network Marketing. Relationships must come before the Marketing. Establish a relationship first - ideally, a relationship built on trust. If people trust you, they're more likely to buy what you recommend.
3. Building relationship does not necessarily take a long time or many conversations and follow-up meetings. We can establish a rapport quickly - even within three minutes - if we would just be sincerely interested in people and their interests or concerns. Focus on people, and what they want; not on ourselves and what we may want out of them. If we do that, and if the prospect is right for us, we will have the opportunity to share the products and/or the opportunity within one conversation.
So, "selling" in itself is not a bad thing. It is how you do it.
Q1. Why do people think and say selling can cause you to lose friends?
Q2. How would (or should) you do it such that you won't lose friends and instead make friends?
Going around the room, we got the following responses to Q1:
#1: I do seem to scare away my friends and I don't even know why ... some people tell me I ask too many questions.
#2: Hard selling, or forcing a sale of a product on friends, is what will lose you friends. Worse, if you are selling what you don't even believe in!
#3: You will lose friends if you are persistent in the wrong way - keep asking people to buy products from you even when they have said "no".
In the discussion that followed, a leader who was concerned that Q1 was even discussed at all, said: If you keep losing friends in the course of prospecting, examine your ways of selling. But do not be too hard on yourself. Sometimes, it is not your selling that is at fault. It is that the prospect is not good enough. There is such a thing as a "Prospect from Hell". We have come across one or two over the years ;)
As the discussion went around the room, with contributions from people of various levels of experience, we quickly established the following consensus response to Q2:
1. When going into a conversation with any prospect, it is important that we go in with the objective of wanting to get to know the person better, not going for a sale. In getting to know a person, we're really looking out or listening up for a fit - a good fit between the prospect's needs and what we can offer. Where a fit cannot be found, we must simply let go.
2. Think Relationship Marketing, another name for Network Marketing. Relationships must come before the Marketing. Establish a relationship first - ideally, a relationship built on trust. If people trust you, they're more likely to buy what you recommend.
3. Building relationship does not necessarily take a long time or many conversations and follow-up meetings. We can establish a rapport quickly - even within three minutes - if we would just be sincerely interested in people and their interests or concerns. Focus on people, and what they want; not on ourselves and what we may want out of them. If we do that, and if the prospect is right for us, we will have the opportunity to share the products and/or the opportunity within one conversation.
So, "selling" in itself is not a bad thing. It is how you do it.
Saturday, March 01, 2008
Take Charge, Dream Big, Play Tall
The last time he spoke in Singapore, Unicity's ex-CEO turned top Diamond-rank distributor Aaron Webber urged us to "Don't Worry, Be Good, Work Hard".
This time, he exhorted us to "Take Charge, Dream Big, Play Tall".
"Big dreams get you out of bed in the mornings. Big dreams will see you through down times. They give you the strength to get through the winter till the spring."
"My dream is to lead the transformation of the industry. The industry is in its adolescence. Just like teenagers, an industry in its adolescence do stupid things ... We have everything we need to lead the industry: the product, the people. We just need to believe that and believe in ourselves. I believe in you."
The following are highlights of some of the ideas that Aaron shared with business associates in three separate sessions from Friday, Feb 15th to Saturday, Feb 16th. Great stuff, all, if you're trying to build a business for yourself. Read on.
Re-invent yourself to stay relevant
Thinking that we have a Blue Ocean strategy, with no competition to speak off, may lull people into complacency, Aaron fears. The competition is watching all the time, and at some point in time, the competition will also find a way to sail into the Blue Ocean, and before you know it, the blue waters will turn purple and then, red.
It is important that while we have the advantage of a Blue Ocean strategy, we should make sure that we constantly reinvent ourselves to stay ahead and stay relevant.
Aaron, which confesses to subscribing somewhat to a "chaos model", said he has seen too many leaders stagnate in the business and then go into control mode. They start coming out with Franchise Manuals, checklists, scripts. If you were to follow these closely, you will lose your personality, he warned.
"Don't lose your personality," he advises. "In the case of McDonald's, if you were to take the pickle out of the Big Mac, you will lose your franchise." In our case, we're welcome to take the oickle out if we think it doesn't suit our market.
While duplication (duplicate what works) helps the business moves along, we ought to allow people room to apply their personalities to their business. They should be welcome to test out new ideas of their own - subject to their staying true to the basics, the core values and the principles. Believe in what you do. Do it naturally - not in a stiff, scripted way.
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Simple solution to any problem - in 3 words
If we are not watchful, our business may grow and then degenerate, as they often do in three stages: Growth => Excuses => Blame. To prevent this degeneration, remember this 3-word advice: GROW YOUR BUSINESS.
At the risk of over-simplifying, think of any problem or excuse that people can have for not doing well in the business, and you can work around it by growing the business. Growing our business is the best answer to every problem, challenge or difficulty.
So, how does one go about "growing the business"?
1. Take Charge, take ownership. Think like an entrepreneur, get to work. "This is your business - not the company's, nor your upline's nor your big leader's." Beyond the products and the cheques, don't depend too much on the company or your uplines to do things for you. Leaders should build and encourage independence; not breed dependence.
2. Work Hard. Aaron said his personal experience proves that "hard work can compensate for a lack of skills". Keep doing whatever it takes to grow the business. Don't go into management mode. We need leaders to be productively engaged. That's been "all that's missing".
To get a harvest (and harvests are never immediate), we must continue to plough and plant. Even if the weather is harsh, we must get out to plough and plant. To get a bigger harvest, we must reinvest part of the previous harvest.
3. "Play tall." Aaron shared his learning experience playing in a basketball team made up of a lot of particularly short people. He remembers the team being intimidated by the prospects of playing teams that are much taller and bigger than them. And what did the coach tell them? Play tall. Act the way you want to be. It did work.
4. Work at being attractive. "We have to make ourselves attractive," Aaron shared. One way is to Be Good, and among many things, being good means doing what you said you would. Be honest, remembering that one is either honest or not. There's no such thing as being "kind of honest". You are either honest or you are not.
Think ROI - and that's not "returns on investments". It is RELATIONSHIPS OVERRIDE INCOME. Treat people as people, not as transactions. Adopt Hard Rock Cafe's motto: Love All, Serve All.
5. Live thankfully. "Be thankful for the latest goodies in the Singapore Budget," said Aaron as he addressed a full house at the company's Chinese New Year Open House on 16 Feb 2008. Be thankful for all the good that comes from living life in Singapore - a great city that many other cities want to emulate. It is easy to forget your blessings when you live in the midst of them every day.
Be thankful for the times that we live in, the opportunity that we have to build a business with the kind of products that we have. Be thankful even for your challenges. They test us and make us stronger and better. "Count your blessings .. We have everything we need to lead the industry: the product, the people. We just need to believe in ourselves. I believe in you. Do you?"
----------
212 for Breakthrough
What is the significance of the number 212, Aaron asked. 212 on the Fahrenheit scale (equivalent to 100 degree Celsius) is the boiling point of water. "In my view, we're at 209-210. Please don't get to 211, get scared and flinch. Keep going."
We may be very close, only a few degrees away from breakthrough.
This time, he exhorted us to "Take Charge, Dream Big, Play Tall".
"Big dreams get you out of bed in the mornings. Big dreams will see you through down times. They give you the strength to get through the winter till the spring."
"My dream is to lead the transformation of the industry. The industry is in its adolescence. Just like teenagers, an industry in its adolescence do stupid things ... We have everything we need to lead the industry: the product, the people. We just need to believe that and believe in ourselves. I believe in you."
The following are highlights of some of the ideas that Aaron shared with business associates in three separate sessions from Friday, Feb 15th to Saturday, Feb 16th. Great stuff, all, if you're trying to build a business for yourself. Read on.
Re-invent yourself to stay relevant
Thinking that we have a Blue Ocean strategy, with no competition to speak off, may lull people into complacency, Aaron fears. The competition is watching all the time, and at some point in time, the competition will also find a way to sail into the Blue Ocean, and before you know it, the blue waters will turn purple and then, red.
It is important that while we have the advantage of a Blue Ocean strategy, we should make sure that we constantly reinvent ourselves to stay ahead and stay relevant.
Aaron, which confesses to subscribing somewhat to a "chaos model", said he has seen too many leaders stagnate in the business and then go into control mode. They start coming out with Franchise Manuals, checklists, scripts. If you were to follow these closely, you will lose your personality, he warned.
"Don't lose your personality," he advises. "In the case of McDonald's, if you were to take the pickle out of the Big Mac, you will lose your franchise." In our case, we're welcome to take the oickle out if we think it doesn't suit our market.
While duplication (duplicate what works) helps the business moves along, we ought to allow people room to apply their personalities to their business. They should be welcome to test out new ideas of their own - subject to their staying true to the basics, the core values and the principles. Believe in what you do. Do it naturally - not in a stiff, scripted way.
--------------
Simple solution to any problem - in 3 words
If we are not watchful, our business may grow and then degenerate, as they often do in three stages: Growth => Excuses => Blame. To prevent this degeneration, remember this 3-word advice: GROW YOUR BUSINESS.
At the risk of over-simplifying, think of any problem or excuse that people can have for not doing well in the business, and you can work around it by growing the business. Growing our business is the best answer to every problem, challenge or difficulty.
So, how does one go about "growing the business"?
1. Take Charge, take ownership. Think like an entrepreneur, get to work. "This is your business - not the company's, nor your upline's nor your big leader's." Beyond the products and the cheques, don't depend too much on the company or your uplines to do things for you. Leaders should build and encourage independence; not breed dependence.
2. Work Hard. Aaron said his personal experience proves that "hard work can compensate for a lack of skills". Keep doing whatever it takes to grow the business. Don't go into management mode. We need leaders to be productively engaged. That's been "all that's missing".
To get a harvest (and harvests are never immediate), we must continue to plough and plant. Even if the weather is harsh, we must get out to plough and plant. To get a bigger harvest, we must reinvest part of the previous harvest.
3. "Play tall." Aaron shared his learning experience playing in a basketball team made up of a lot of particularly short people. He remembers the team being intimidated by the prospects of playing teams that are much taller and bigger than them. And what did the coach tell them? Play tall. Act the way you want to be. It did work.
4. Work at being attractive. "We have to make ourselves attractive," Aaron shared. One way is to Be Good, and among many things, being good means doing what you said you would. Be honest, remembering that one is either honest or not. There's no such thing as being "kind of honest". You are either honest or you are not.
Think ROI - and that's not "returns on investments". It is RELATIONSHIPS OVERRIDE INCOME. Treat people as people, not as transactions. Adopt Hard Rock Cafe's motto: Love All, Serve All.
5. Live thankfully. "Be thankful for the latest goodies in the Singapore Budget," said Aaron as he addressed a full house at the company's Chinese New Year Open House on 16 Feb 2008. Be thankful for all the good that comes from living life in Singapore - a great city that many other cities want to emulate. It is easy to forget your blessings when you live in the midst of them every day.
Be thankful for the times that we live in, the opportunity that we have to build a business with the kind of products that we have. Be thankful even for your challenges. They test us and make us stronger and better. "Count your blessings .. We have everything we need to lead the industry: the product, the people. We just need to believe in ourselves. I believe in you. Do you?"
----------
212 for Breakthrough
What is the significance of the number 212, Aaron asked. 212 on the Fahrenheit scale (equivalent to 100 degree Celsius) is the boiling point of water. "In my view, we're at 209-210. Please don't get to 211, get scared and flinch. Keep going."
We may be very close, only a few degrees away from breakthrough.
Saturday, February 09, 2008
Teacher-Students Reunion 36 years on
Chinese New Year is a time for reunions, especially family reunions, and quite often reunion of friends or ex-classmates in the hometowns. But a reunion of teacher and students? I don't know about you. But that's a rarity for me. If and when that happens, that'd be an exceptional bonus. My brother Eng Hooi and I received just such an Exceptional Bonus this Chinese New Year back home in Penang.
Please meet our Commerce Teacher from our secondary school years in Assumption Secondary School in Penang in the early 1970s, Mr CHEE THOE LAY a.k.a. Kojak.
Eng Hooi remembers he'd be angry about being called Kojak, then. But he must have mellowed with age, like people in general are prone to. It was Mr Chee himself who reminded us that we used to call him Kojak - but he didn't remind us that we did that behind his back. Kojak (acted by Telly Savalas (?)) was that bald-headed detective who spoke with a drawl in a TV series.
That, I had forgotten, but quickly recalled on his jovial reminder. Mr Chee has obviously learnt to laugh at himself even more. As Chris was taking this photo, he called out, "Wait, let me comb my hair first!" What hair!
I remember Mr Chee well for sending all of us, as the first exercise at the end of our first lesson in Commerce in Form 1 (1974), to go open a bank account of our own. It'd have been the first bank account for almost all of us, if not all. I obediently went to the nearby Chartered Bank (now Standard Chartered Bank) in Bagan Luar Rd to open my first bank savings account. That was to be my first of many encounters with the world of finance. I was also to maintain that account for the next 30 years!
We met Mr Chee at the Arena foodcourt ("let's eat here, it's cheap and good") of the spanking new waterfront shopping centre, Queensbay Mall, overlooking the prison turned spa resort island of Jerejak.
Mr Chee looks well. He has been taking extra good care of himself, after a mild stroke in 2000. That taught him to manage or avoid needless stress better, and eat (less) according to his (reduced) needs.
"People our age don't need that much food because we don't do that much anyway."
Daily life for him is an early morning walk, a good breakfast (no lunch), go home to take a good look at his stock market investments ("see whether to take my profit or to let them ride") and after that, a good sleep until ... dinner? Or something like that ...
Mr Chee, who taught us in the early 1970s, taught for 6 years in Assumption (now defunct). Then, it was 6 years in LaSalle (now defunct too - "must be because I am one of the "Pek Kah Te" teachers, he said). After that, he taught for 14 "too long" years in Heng Ee. The location suited the demands of the time then, when he as the more mobile parent had to ferry his three children to different schools at different times.
In Heng Ee, because he opted to teach in the afternoon session, he was given the heavy responsibility of being the discipline master. How does he discipline difficult boys in a school infamous for its discipline problems? "I'd ask them out for a game of water polo ... " As a result, most of them (the bad ones) play water polo, he said.
Mr Chee has also been a part-time swimming coach. It was in that role at the University in Penang, USM, that he run into Eng Hooi when my brother was doing his undergraduate studies.
It's been more than 30 years - 36 years for Eng Hooi, 34 for me counting from our first encounters in Form 1. We remember Mr Chee well, and feel extra privileged to be remembered by him.
Thank You Sir, for the times then.
Thank You Sir for making the connection after all these years!
It was so fun catching up after all these decades.
We appreciate you :)
Please meet our Commerce Teacher from our secondary school years in Assumption Secondary School in Penang in the early 1970s, Mr CHEE THOE LAY a.k.a. Kojak.
Eng Hooi remembers he'd be angry about being called Kojak, then. But he must have mellowed with age, like people in general are prone to. It was Mr Chee himself who reminded us that we used to call him Kojak - but he didn't remind us that we did that behind his back. Kojak (acted by Telly Savalas (?)) was that bald-headed detective who spoke with a drawl in a TV series.
That, I had forgotten, but quickly recalled on his jovial reminder. Mr Chee has obviously learnt to laugh at himself even more. As Chris was taking this photo, he called out, "Wait, let me comb my hair first!" What hair!
I remember Mr Chee well for sending all of us, as the first exercise at the end of our first lesson in Commerce in Form 1 (1974), to go open a bank account of our own. It'd have been the first bank account for almost all of us, if not all. I obediently went to the nearby Chartered Bank (now Standard Chartered Bank) in Bagan Luar Rd to open my first bank savings account. That was to be my first of many encounters with the world of finance. I was also to maintain that account for the next 30 years!
We met Mr Chee at the Arena foodcourt ("let's eat here, it's cheap and good") of the spanking new waterfront shopping centre, Queensbay Mall, overlooking the prison turned spa resort island of Jerejak.
Mr Chee looks well. He has been taking extra good care of himself, after a mild stroke in 2000. That taught him to manage or avoid needless stress better, and eat (less) according to his (reduced) needs.
"People our age don't need that much food because we don't do that much anyway."
Daily life for him is an early morning walk, a good breakfast (no lunch), go home to take a good look at his stock market investments ("see whether to take my profit or to let them ride") and after that, a good sleep until ... dinner? Or something like that ...
Mr Chee, who taught us in the early 1970s, taught for 6 years in Assumption (now defunct). Then, it was 6 years in LaSalle (now defunct too - "must be because I am one of the "Pek Kah Te" teachers, he said). After that, he taught for 14 "too long" years in Heng Ee. The location suited the demands of the time then, when he as the more mobile parent had to ferry his three children to different schools at different times.
In Heng Ee, because he opted to teach in the afternoon session, he was given the heavy responsibility of being the discipline master. How does he discipline difficult boys in a school infamous for its discipline problems? "I'd ask them out for a game of water polo ... " As a result, most of them (the bad ones) play water polo, he said.
Mr Chee has also been a part-time swimming coach. It was in that role at the University in Penang, USM, that he run into Eng Hooi when my brother was doing his undergraduate studies.
It's been more than 30 years - 36 years for Eng Hooi, 34 for me counting from our first encounters in Form 1. We remember Mr Chee well, and feel extra privileged to be remembered by him.
Thank You Sir, for the times then.
Thank You Sir for making the connection after all these years!
It was so fun catching up after all these decades.
We appreciate you :)
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